Tender Hearts

Shaken Up

Tom sat on his pull-out bed, his face in his hands, drenched with tears. After months and months of pain, she was gone and he felt lost. His mother had been his source of strength, the glue that held the family together. While he'd been expecting the call, he hadn't realized it would be so soon. And, no sooner had he hung up the phone after speaking to Daniel than the tears came. He felt helpless.

Daniel had a good head on his shoulders, Tom knew. As their mother's health failed, he'd had the wherewithal to make her funeral arrangements so no one would have to deal with it once she was gone. For that, Tom was thankful. He was so numb, he couldn't think. His little brother was definitely the practical one in the family.

As the tears subsided, Tom called into work. When Vanessa answered the phone, he explained the situation. "Don't you worry," she'd said. "Take all the time you need." Of course, she didn't realize that he had no safety net. His bank account was nearly wiped out by bills at the end of each pay period. He couldn't afford to take more time off.

Shortly after he got off the phone with Vanessa, his sister, Mary called. "Hey, Little Brother," she said when he answered. "I wanted to let you know that Aidan and I will be coming on Friday for Mum's funeral."

"Alright," he replied. Between the emotional battering he'd received from Evie, the difficulty of his work and the fact that Frank had become insufferably smug, and now the loss of his mother, Tom felt bereft. "I'll warn you, I don't really have much room here." He wondered where he would be able to put them.

"Don't worry about it," Mary replied. "We've got reservations at a hotel that's halfway between you and Dan. I wouldn't expect either of you to put up with a squalling newborn." She sounded so much more upbeat than he thought she would, but he knew she was just using the bubbly side of her personality to mask the pain.

Tom thought of his newborn niece. "How considerate of you," he said, adding, "You know, I really can't wait to meet our little Jennie."

"And I can't wait for you and Dan to meet her," she sighed. "I just wish we'd been able to get back to The States before Mum..." And there were the tears. He could hear her begin to sob and sniffle. "I've got to go," she finally said before hanging up.

He spent the rest of his night in silent reverie, leaving the apartment long enough to get the customary sandwich from the Cuban market below, returning with it to his apartment and promptly stowing it in the refrigerator. It smelled wonderful and he had no doubt it tasted the same, but his stomach turned at the thought of food, his appetite twisted by grief.

By morning, he was exhausted, having fought the sleep he needed so much with thoughts about the future. Daniel had decided to take Mary up on her offer of relocating to Germany and attending school and would be leaving after the lease on his apartment was up at the end of the next month. Tom considered doing the same, since, at that point, would have no family and very few ties in the area. It was all incredibly daunting. There was also the possibility of moving out of state, perhaps to Las Vegas, where he could make more money.

Grief and uncertainty aside, his stomach decided, finally that he was hungry. He pulled the sandwich from the night before out of the refrigerator and devoured it before showering, dressing in fresh clothing and leaving to the laundromat for the day to do his wash for the week. Not only was he in charge of his own personal belongings, but Vanessa had also charged him with making sure the costumes were laundered. For that, she paid him an extra stipend. It covered the laundering of his own things as well and then some, so he was thankful for the opportunity.