A New Kind of Feeling // Creek

Chapter 12- Tweek

I've been avoiding Craig ever since the sleeping incident. Well, I've been avoiding him the best you can avoid someone you work with every day. We talk at work, but only about work, and I've mainly just been responding to his texts with just a word or two. I definitely let myself get too into liking him, and I seriously needed to take a step back to get over it.

I don't even know why he was still talking to me after the sleeping incident. I think most guys would get creeped out when their gay friend gets a little too touchy feely. I mean sure Tolkien and Clyde got a little like that sometimes, but I'm pretty sure it was in a straight guy locker room humor kinda way (which I'll never actually understand).

I went to find Butters, one of the few out kids at school and one of my only friends besides Craig. I finally find him, leaned up against his locker talking to Kenny. "Hey Butters, could I uh borrow you for a second?" I ask.

"Sure!" He answers happily, telling Kenny goodbye. As we walk off together he asks me "what's up Tweek?"

"Well you know how I've been crushing on Craig for like, forever?" I ask, shuffling my feet awkwardly underneath me.

Butters' eyes light up immediately. "Wait did something happen? Are you two together now? Tell me everything!"

"Well, we're not exactly together. I guess I've just been getting some mixed signals from him. He can be so nice sometimes, then other times totally blunt like he doesn't care. It's hard to get a good read on what he's feeling. But it almost seems like he might like me back sometimes, then other times he acts like a completely different person, especially around his friends. I guess I'm just really confused because he told me he was straight when we broke up, but then he brought me to Tolkien's movie night even though all the other guys had dates, so was I like supposed to be his date or something? I mean, we held hands for like the whole movie but then the lights came on and he immediately stopped like he didn't want to get caught."

"Wow that's tough," Butters replied, wrinkling up his nose. "It could mean he likes you and is just figuring some stuff out. But I'd be careful with him. Sometimes guys who aren't totally out will find guys like us to fool around with in secret, just to see what they're into. It's not real fun being used like that," he says, making me wonder if he was speaking from personal experience on that one.

"So you think Craig is just trying to use me?" I ask nervously.

Butters shrugs, "I can't say for sure, but it's definitely possible."