The Evening in Summer | Summertime Series #1| YVE

PROLOGUE

PROLOGUE

BACK THEN someone asked me "what things you wish you were better at" did you know what i answered? "i wish i were smarter than my ate so that mommy and daddy will love me just like how they loved my older sister!" i didn't know what i was saying that time since 6 years old pa lamang ako, simula nuon nadala ko na ang ganung mindset hanggang sa lumaki ako.

i only wished for my parents to love me and look at me the same way they look at my sibling. Since that day it was my parents that made me cry silently and exhausted me at the same time. i continued to pursue their expectations and waited, but it never happened or came, i still haven't realized yet that i wasn't enough for them... that i will never be good enough for them. but i know that there will comes a day that my dreams will be granted!

ika pa nga 'dreaming is the beginning of getting everything you want' that's why i never give up because my dream is to make my mommy and daddy proud, but that dream seems so impossible to reach.

'it's the same guy again' sabi ko nalamang sa isipan ko ng makita na naman yung lalaki na nag c-cutting classes, it's still 10 in the morning, palagi ko na siyang napapansin these days dahil narin siguro dito sila madalas dumadaan malapit sa classroom namin para tumakas.

and sino ba naman kase ang hindi makaka-kilala sa kaniya? he's famous in our school for being a headache, Meron pang ibang rason kung bakit sikat sila ng mga ka grupo niya, dahil narin siguro sa 'guwapo' raw at tumutugtog ng musika. kung saan last semester na diyan pa talaga sila nagiging pasaway, well it's not like i care about them anyways.

"so... who would like to answer this question?" miss galez said after writing on the board. i averted my gaze towards her and raised my right hand para sumagot sa blackboard.

"okay, we have miss mercadejas, here's the chalk" miss galez said and then handed me the chalk with that usual smile on her face, i heard some murmurs in the back pero hindi ko na lamang iyon pinansin at naglakad na palapit sa board.

"hayaan mo na, that's how nerds act naman e, bida-bida" i heard one of my girl classmate laugh secretly, i find her laughters really annoying since ako ang pinag-uusapan nila. after answering ay matiim kung tinignan yung babae na kaagad namang natahimik sa upuan niya, i rolled my eyes then sat on my armchair atsaka muli akong lumingon sa banda nung mga lalaking tumakas sa klase but as what i have expected, wala na sila, siguro nakaalis na.

LUNCHTIME na at isa-isa ko ng nilagay sa bag ko ang mga gamit ko, ang dinala ko lamang ay 'yong notebook at libro ko para sa next subject para makapag review narin.

ilang weeks na lamang closing na ng school year namin, i don't know why some of my classmates are sad saying na gusto nila na manatili lang sa grade 10 kase ayaw raw nila na mahiwalay sa mga napalapit na sa kanila na mga kaklase, but i can't realate, i don't have that specific friend that i can actually trust, well to be exact i don't have a friends, mga acquaintance lang, ganun kaya tinatanggapna ko nalang sa tuwing tinatawag nila akong 'loner' o 'di kaya 'loser', just like what i said earlier, i have some people that i know but i don't really consider them as a friend na kaya kung pag sabihan ng mga sekreto ko o maging ka chikahan ko.

i don't do any kind of relationships, i think those are just bothersome, baka ma distract lang ako sa pag-aaral
kapag may mga kaibigan ako, and it's not like i can't live without friends! duh i am confident naman kaya kung gawin ang mga bagay-bagay mag-isa, kahit sa acads pa 'yan, i am always the top 1 eversince elementary ako and all of that that is because of my hard work, i never asked anyone for help nor my sister.