Feeling Again-Mattheo Riddle;Book 2

Chapter 29: 2nd Step

Snow's POV: 

 TW: Drug Use 

"What. The. Fuck." 

Adalie stared back at me, an ashamed look on her face.

"Well look who it is," I say, not able to resist the spite in my voice. "What, so you just left Sky to die? You didn't even think to get help? Or call 911?" 

She sobbed even harder, still at the mouth of my cave. It was pouring rain outside and her curly hair was getting soaked as she remained outside, her eyes showing all the guilt in her eyes. "I'm sorry. I thought he was dead," she said, her voice getting more teary. "I didn't mean to kill him, I swear." She sucks in another shaky breath through her teeth as she tries to speak further. "I just can't control what I do. It's like a surge goes through me and once it leaves me, it does it's own thing." 

I know the feeling. 

Wait, what? 

I can no longer feel any hatred for her. It would be hypocritical of me. "Get in here Adalie, you're going to get sick." She hesitantly got up and slowly entered the cave, as water droplets slipped of her and covered the cave ground. "I'm not mad at you, Adalie. I can't. Sky told me not to get mad at you." 

She stopped looking at the ground at this, and gave me a surprised look. "What?"

I nod, a small smile on my face. "You know what his last words were while he was leaving?" She shook her head no. Of course she doesn't, she wasn't there."He said he loved you. He really saw you as his sister, Adalie." 

"I saw him as mine too," she said, weeping. 

"Your sister?" I say, trying to lighten the mood. 

"Brother, whatever, you know what I mean," she chuckled. She continued taking deep breathes, trying to calm herself down. "I didn't want to barge into your little hideout spot like this, but I didn't have anywhere else to go." 

I shrugged my shoulders as if to say, whatever. "How'd you find me anyways?" 

"I figured you wouldn't stray too far from Hogwarts because they would assume you'd hide far far away, so you likely thought that hiding right underneath their noses was a smarter idea." 

I can't help the small smile that ends up playing on my face. "You're insanely smart, aren't you?" She blushes slightly at the compliment. "But look, I can't risk you getting danger, so I'll have to figure something out for you. I'm trying to recover from... something, and it isn't pretty. You have to be somewhere else, I'm sorry." 

She nodded in understanding. "Don't worry, I understand. I'll think of somewhere else." 

"You don't have to leave right away! Just wait until you figure out where to go." 

That night, when Adalie was sound asleep, I was at the mouth of the cave, staring up at the sky, and looking at the stars that scattered the sky. The light of the stars I was seeing traveled years and years just for me to see them. I was seeing the stars as they were years ago, and yet I was worried about what? I wasn't even dust in the universe. Any thing I did, no matter how minor or major it was, would never impact anything. If I did drugs today, nothing in the world would be effected. If I killed someone today, nothing in the world would change. 

I got up from my sleeping bag and quickly snagged my bottle and walked to the mouth of the cave. 

"Fuck you Snow, even when there's a child in the damn space with you," I mutter to myself in disappointment. I crush up just one of the pills and quickly snort it, knowing this way, I'll take less but the feeling will still be there.