➕SPORADIC✖️

Refuge

Walking into your room you gasped for air. The second the door slid shut you dropped and cried out against the floor. An excruciating cry that rattled your bones from the weeks of anger, fear, and hate building up in you. Your strained voice muffled into the soft carpet. Tears streamed from your eyes and burned through the floor.

'If I wasn't so useless. If I wasn't so weak. He's right. Why wasn't I strong? Why am I not like them? Why can't I be them? '

A flash flood of Peter ran through your eyes again, those last horrible few moments of him being broken and crushed over and over. It was all right in front of you again. And just like then, there's nothing you can do about it. You were breathing above water for a moment and now you're back to drowning. What made you think you could move on so easily?

'Selfish, useless, weak, coward. What the hell was my purpose in my universe? Was I born just to get Spider-Man killed? Just to be a sporadic accident? Peter... I'm so sorry... I'm so... sorry. I'm...'

"If I can't be your hero, promise me you'll be your own hero."

A wave of guilt crashed through you once more. It shook out pain through your whole body as you heard Peter's words echo through your head before sizzling with burning silence. Your cries were nothing but white noise as you sunk further into your void. Never would you wish this pain on anyone, your own mental torment was worse than the visions of him being killed and the trauma your body endured that day against the road.

Miguel's voice struck through you once more. His disgusted expression played in your eyes. The ' being 's sinister metallic face broke your thoughts. His dead-cold voice shattered your hearing, as if he was towering  over your broken form once again.

Hate.

Hate.

Hate.

It coursed through you. So much of it for so many things. You were delirious with it, internally begging for some sort of outlet or saving. This isn't you... you're not like this. Peter wouldn't even recognize you... you don't even recognize you...

*chirp*

*zzzt*

*chirp*

Raising your head from the ground to the small sounds buzzing in front of you, your eyes land on Spud zooming back and forth trying to get your attention. He jumps as his big round eyes analyze your distraught face. He speeds up your arm and makes his way to your face before swirling around your cheeks and collecting your falling tears. Little *zaps* are heard as he hits every one, like an old arcade game destroying little imaginary enemies.

It doesn't fix you unlike Spud's intentions, but it does make you crack a smile. You weakly shake with a breathy laugh feeling more tears drop and Spud kick into overdrive to catch them. You peel the little bot off your cheek making his 8 legs squirm to reach back for your wet droplets still needing clean up. You sigh holding him in your palms.

"Thank you." you whisper with a quivering lip.

It seems to mellow him out as he looks up at your beautifully sorrowed face and travels up your thumb and squeezes it tightly with his little limbs. He chirps against your hand, patiently waiting with you till your breathing evens out. After a few minutes you feel a cool breath sink through your body, bringing you back to the air around you and easing the fire in your limbs.