COWBOY LIKE ME

Stay

"Do you want hot chocolate or tea?" Pip asked as Ravi made himself comfortable on her couch.

"Tea, easy."

"Coming right up!" She quipped, turning the kettle on as she grabbed two mugs and opened the fridge.

For herself, she grabbed the milk jug and poured some into her mug, tearing open the cocoa mix, and watching the dust fall into the milk.

She breathed deeply as she mixed the two together and glanced at the kettle before she pushed her mug into the microwave above the oven.

As the microwave hummed, she poured the warm water into Ravi's mug, the teabag floating to the top — she knew immediately what flavor Ravi would want. She knew him.

"Do you want... uh, honey?"

"Yes, dear?" Ravi quipped, turning around on the couch to face her.

Her heart must've sank, then, because she knew it was a joke — they had always joked like that — but it meant so much more, now.

"Do you?"

"Yeah."

Ravi sounded clearly disappointed that Pip didn't play along, but she couldn't let herself do that. No matter how badly she hated, despised, loathed Leila, she couldn't keep letting her get hurt.

But, at the same time, she wished the worst for Leila — the worst, burning, agonizing pain. She wished she were dead.

She just didn't want her to go through the pain of being cheated on again.

And because of that, she kept a noticeable difference between them as she sat on the couch and slowly sipped at her hot cocoa.

The room was silent. Still.

"So, um," Ravi mumbled. "We're... we're good, right? Like, you kind of ghosted me for a few weeks."

"We've been good. I think I was having some sort of episode or something. But we're okay." She promised, nearly reaching for his hand.

He caught that, but neither of them uttered a word about it.

***

Fuck.

She hated him. She wanted to rip out his hair and wrap her angry fingers around his throat because somehow, he had led her straight to her own bedroom.

Somehow, he had her ever so gently pressed against her own bedroom door, her hands pinned on either side of her head, Ravi's fingers entwining through hers. His lips against hers.

Her eyes fluttered open, and he must've known, because he pulled away to stare at her.

"Um, Pip?"

She shook her head. "Stop doing this."

"What?"

"Coming to my house as if we're just friends, and then thirty minutes later, being all over me. You - you have a girlfriend, Ravi," she was choked up, now, turning away from him and watching the snow fall from her window.

"Y-Yeah, but..."

"Just...stop. If you want this," she turned on her heel and motioned between them. "To continue? Then you have to break up with her."

"I-"

She sighed, sitting on the edge of her bed with her head in her hands. "I can't believe I actually..."

Pip trailed off, mumbling against her hand.

"What?"

"Nothing. Just...you should go, I think."