❝I was screaming, "Long live all the magic we made❞
in which jude walters just wants to relax this summer,
but ends up getting caught up in conklin/fisher family issues.
[academic rivals to lovers]
[fem!oc x steven conklin]
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I had no plans to cry today and so far, I had been successful. I had put on my gown and done my makeup without shedding a single tear. My plan was almost ruined when I walked downstairs and heard my mom crying to Never Grow Up by Taylor Swift. I felt my heart clench at the sound of my mom's tears and when she saw me and full-on sobbed, I forced myself to smile to keep the tears away. I took countless pictures with Millie for our mothers and walked into the school for the last time still successful on my mission. Today was supposed to be a happy day, and it was. I had gone through hell these last four years, academically and otherwise. I was happy to be moving on to the next stage in my life and completing step two in My Plan.
I glanced at my mom who was still dabbing her eyes with tissues as our principal said something I was drowning out. I couldn't see it from the stage but I knew in her lap sat my journal that contained The Plan. I had asked her to bring it, it felt like a full circle moment to have it here when I walked across the stage, headed towards the second check on my list. Call me corny, but having it made it feel like fifth-grade me was sitting in the audience right now.
Which I guess was a stupid thought. I am fifth-grade me and fifth-grade me is me but in my mind, they're two different entities. Fifth-grade me was the dreamer, the planner, the ringleader of my future. Current me, eighteen-year-old-me, (almost) high school graduate me, was the pawn making all those plans and dreams come true.
"How ya doing, Walters? The sting of defeat getting to you?" I glanced over at the boy who I could only describe as my rival. Despite how childish it sounded.
Every class I took, every club I joined, everything I did in high school, Steven Conklin was there to do it better. I still hadn't forgiven myself for letting him get the one thing that was supposed to be mine.
My eyes trailed down from his eyes to the stole hanging from his neck. VALEDICTORIAN, read vertically down it. He had noticed the movement of my eyes and a smirk came to his lips. I refused to glance down at my own stole that said salutatorian.
"Suck my dick, Conklin."
I thought back to My Plan;
1. Graduate high school as valedictorian 2. go to an Ivy Leauge college 3. Graduate college 4. Get a job that pays MILLIONS 5. Date 6. Get married 7. Have two kids (a boy and a girl) 8. Get rich 9. Retire 10. HAPPILY EVER AFTER!!!!
I had high goals as a kid and I had every plan to meet them all. But because of Steven Conklin, I could never achieve step number one of the plan.
The principal finished his speech and Steven plastered a perfect smile on before standing and walking to the podium.
I hated even more that his speech was so good. Everyone laughed when appropriate and by looking at the faces of my classmates, I could tell the message had gotten to them. Everyone cheered as he finished and I forced myself to clap with the crowd. The salutatorian didn't give a speech. The salutatorian was just second place, runner up. The Salutatorian didn't matter, I didn't matter. Can I even make The Plan come true? For the first time today, I cried. Because maybe, I'm not enough.
