Meant To Be

Chapter 3

Chapter title-  The truth

•Jamie's pov•
Claire told me everything, the whole truth.
At first I didn't hate the fact the she was from the future, just a wee bit shocked but it all makes sense.
But I started to realize that she said 'say you'll do right by me'
Meaning she wants to go back, to her own time and her life.
Her head is resting on my chest and I notice she's asleep.
I softly brush her hair and let some tears out of my eyes.
Carefully I wipe 'en away before they can reach Claire, I dinna want her to feel bad and stay because she deserves to live the life she has always wanted to live.
~A Few Hours Later~
I wake up finding Claire dressing herself up.
"Claire?" I ask her, thinking she already is leaving.
She turns around and smiles. "You slept long,"
I smile and I stand up.
"You okay?" She asks when I hug her tightly.
I nod. "Aye, but we do have to leave,"
"Why? Where to?" She asks confused.
"Home,"
She smiles and kisses me, she continues dressing.
I fail to tell her that her home is not the same is my home.
I always wished we could have our home together, but it isna possible.
A little while later we come downstairs and almost all of the men are inside.
"Murtagh. Claire and I are leaving, ye need to distract the men. Come to Lallybroch in a few weeks." I say and I take Claire her hand.
He nods and Claire and I go outside to the horses.
"Ye dinna have yer own horse, so we'll go on my horse,"
She nods and helps me get the horse ready.
"Sassenach, give me yer foot, I'll help you up," I say and so she does.
When she's sitting on the horse I step up myself behind her.
I put my head on her shoulder and we talk a bit.
We talk about Lallybroch and her life before me.
For the night we stop in the woods on a safe place and we make a fire.
When Claire is asleep I look at her.
Tomorrow we reach Craigh Na Dunn, I have to say goodbye to my love.
I brush my hand trough her hair and with my other hand I brush over her lips.
I slowly go down with my hand under her skirt and up to her honeypot.
I go inside her with my fingers and Claire's eyes open.
She starts to breath faster and puts her hands on my cheek.
She moans softly at first but gets louder every second.
"Jamie... I want you..." she moans. "I want you inside me,"
"No Sassenach, I want to watch ye," I say putting my forehead on hers.
She moans louder and puts her hands around my neck, she pulls me closer to her, brushing her lips against mine.
After a few minutes I give in and kiss her passionately.
After seconds Claire stops and looks at me. "I want you inside me please,"
I grin and take away my hand and lay on her.
She kisses my neck and I push myself inside her.
I moan and she gasps for air.
"Oh god.... Jamie oh my god," she cries out.
I continue to serve her and when I'm done she's in tears.
"What's wrong? Did I hurt ye Claire?" I ask her putting my hand on her cheek.
"No, you didn't hurt me. It was so good, I couldn't keep the tears in,"
I smile and I know I served her well.
She closes her eyes and falls asleep in my arms.

•Claire's pov•
When I wake up the next morning I still feel tired but yet so good.
"Jamie," I whisper tapping his cheek.
I get not response and I call his name again.
He opens his eyes and looks at me. "Claire.."
I smile and I kiss his lips.
He sits up and looks around. "Ye should wash yerself in the river,"
I nod and take out plaid with me.
I'm already 15 minutes down at the river Jamie comes to me.
"Are ye ready to go home Sassenach?" He says smiling weakly.
I turn around, stand up and smile. "Yes,"
"Come along then," he says sticking out his hand and I grab it.
We walk for a little while until Jamie says to me to look over the hill.
I smile in confusion and walk over the hill.
He walks behind me and when I look over the hill my smile fades. Craigh Na Dunn.
I look at Jamie and he puts his hand on my shoulder. "Ye said ye wanted to go home, here it is. 'Tis what you always wanted,"
I nod. "Yes,"
We walk towards the stones and when I'm walking to the biggest I can hear the buzzing.
"What did ye do last time when ye got trough?" He asks looking from the stone to me.
"I don't know," I say. "I just walked towards the stone and I heard this buzzing sound, I just touched it," when I almost touch the stone Jamie grabs my hand and pulls me away.
"Wait! Claire," he says holding me.
I smile. "I'm sorry, it was stupid to go there, let's go,"
"What? No, yer going,"  he says letting me go again.
I'm confused. "What why?"
"Because ye deserve a good life, with friends, a husband, yer job," he says kissing my hands. "And hot baths,"
I laugh. "I have a good life here, not many but some friends, you are my husband, and I can do healing here,"
"No Sassenach, it isna safe here, go," he says and he walks down the hill.
"Jamie! You're not serious are you?" I ask in disbelief. Where did my Scottish warrior go? The one that didn't want to let me go for a moment?
"Aye, goodbye Claire," he yells and continues walking.
I laugh quietly. Is he serious?
I run down to Jamie and jump on his back.
He stumbles and falls with me on his back.
"Christ Claire, what are ye doing?"
"I'm staying with you, my sexy, stubborn and red headed Scot," I say kissing his hair.
"Claire ye canna-"
I smile. "You can't tell me what I can or cannot do, I love you Jamie and I want to be with you now and forever,"
"I love ye too Claire! Oh god I'm so glad ye want to stay wi' me," he says kissing me and hugging me tight.
I hug him too and we walk to his horse.
We ride for another few days until we reach Lallybroch.
"It's magical," I say looking at the house.
"Aye," Jamie sounds distant.
"Jamie.. I know what you heard but promise me you'll act normal," I say putting my hands on his cheek.
He nods and we continue walking to Lallybroch.
When we arrive Jamie puts his horse in a stable and I walk to a little boy playing with the apples.
I talk with him and I hear a woman's voice call Jamie.
I look up and so does the little boy, Jamie comes from the stables and looks at the woman.
"Jenny," he says and when she sees him she runs toward him and hugs him close.
They talk a bit about how long it took Jamie to say something.
"This is wee Jamie," she says when the little boy comes to Jenny. "This is yer uncle Mo cridhe, the one yer named after,"
Jamie looks upset when she says that. "Why? Why would ye do that?"
"What's wrong? Are ye ill?"
"Why would ye name him after me? Don't you think I've suffered enough?" He says and when he says that Jenny looks offended.
"Suffered? What do ye mean? I have missed ye all these years and I thought it would be an honor that he would be named after ye," she says and she looks sad that Jamie doesn't like it.
"Ye think I wanted ye to name a bastard after me?"
She scoffs. "A bastard? Is that what ye think? That my son is a bastard?"
"Is he? Huh?" Jamie yells at her.
I walk to Jamie and grab his arms. "Jamie, act normal! How dare you speak to your sister that way? You don't even let her explain,"
He looks at me with fury in his eyes. "It's my sister, and I demand answers."
"And I'm your wife, and she is my sister-in-law so I'll appreciate it if you'd act normal and let her explain,"
Jenny looks at me full surprise that I stood up to Jamie like that.
"Look Jenny, ye have to understand why I react like this. Dougal he told me Randall got ye with child,"  Jamie says apologetic to Jenny.
"And ye believed him?" She asked, she sounds calmer but still upset.
"Of course I believed him. He told me that and what was I supposed to do or think?"
"You could've come back! To see or hear it from me!" She yells and she sounds hurt now.
I see the tears in Jamie's eyes. "I couldn't! I was embarrassed! I couldn't protect ye from that bastard! All this time I felt like it was my fault that this happend to ye Jenny. I felt guilty! That's why I didn't come back.."
Jenny softens up immediately when he says that.
I have the urge to comfort Jamie but I don't, Jenny should and so she does.
"Oh Jamie, I'm sorry," she says and hugs him tight.
He holds Jenny close to him and his arms are wrapped tightly around her.
I smile, it's a sweet sight.
"It's not yer fault Jenny. I'm sorry, I should've sent word," he says when he lets go of her.
"Ye should've, but I'm glad yer home."
It's quiet for a moment.
"Now tell me about yer wife," Jenny says walking to me. "Yer name is Claire aye? Dougal told me about yer marriage, of it's arrangement,"
I smile. "Yes it was an arrangement, but I've grown to love Jamie."
"Good, ye sound sweet. Let's go inside," Jenny says and Jamie takes me hand.
We sit down on the couch and talk a bit about my upbringing and all the things we went trough.
"Wait, if Randall isn't yer bairns father, who is?" Jamie asks all of the sudden.
Jenny and I both smile of his late reaction.
"The father and my husband is Ian Murray,"
Jamie shoots up. "Ian?"
"Who's Ian?" I ask confused.
"My best friend," Jamie says.
"Aye, we're married and the father of my bairns."
Jamie looks rather happy. "That's amazing! Where is he now?"
"Out with father," Jenny says.
Jamie nods. "And mother? Where is she?"
"Market, they will all be back soon," she says smiling. "and they are going to be so happy,"
Jamie nods again and sits down.
"Ye hear that Claire? I'm going to see my parents again!" He says excited, he looks like a child in a candy shop.
I smile brightly. "I know Jamie. I have ears myself,"
He kisses me and he waits impatiently with his head on my shoulder.
At the end of the day we hear a horse coming.
"They're here!" Jamie says happily.
He wants to go but I stop him. "Jamie, what if your family doesn't like me?"
He smiles and kisses my forehead. "They won't, they'll love you, believe me,"
I smile and kiss him.
Jamie stands up and walks outside.
I walk behind him quickly and see a beautiful woman with the same red hair as Jamie.
"Ma," Jamie says quietly.
"Jamie! O my, my boy!" She says stepping of the horse and running to Jamie.
He hugs her tight and he starts to cry. "Your okay..."
I quickly walk to the horse and put it away.
"Are ye okay my boy? Your back... is it bad?" She asks cupping his head in her hands.
"'Twas, not anymore, they're just scars,"
She hugs him again and then looks at me.
"You must be Claire," she says and hugs me to.
The hugs she gives me is warm and full of love.
"Yer such a pretty lass, I can see why Jamie loves you,"
"Me pretty? Have you looked at yerself, your beautiful,"
She smiles and looks at Jamie.
"Ye can say much, but the way ye look at her Jamie, this wasn't an arranged marriage,"
"Nah, ''twas really arranged, but I loved her long before," Jamie says walking towards us.
"And I grew to love Jamie," I say.
"You guys are adorable, let's go inside again, it's starting to get cold," she says and puts us all inside.
We sit on the couch and talk some.
Jenny has wee Jamie on her lap and I see how happy see is with him.
I feel a hurting in my heart that I couldn't have children.
"Claire? Are ye okay lass?" Ellen asks worried seeing me dose off.
"Yes, I'm just tired. Is there somewhere I could rest for a moment?"
"Aye, I'll give ye guys a room," Ellen says and she takes me to a bedroom.
She makes the bed and sits me down.
"Yer bad at hiding things Claire, what is it?" She says holding my hands.
"I saw Jenny with young Jamie and.. it just reminded me that I maybe can't have children,"
"Why would ye think that?"
"Once when we have more time I'll tell you everything but I was married before for eight years but he's no living. But we never had any children," I say and tears are in my eyes.
She smiles faintly. "Lass, does Jamie know?"
"I don't think so, I never told him, do you think he'll hate me?"
"Hate ye? He loves ye till dead, no he won't hate ye. I do think ye should talk to him." She says kindly.
I nod. "Can you send him up for me?"
She nods and walks downstairs
I lay down in bed and after a minute Jamie opens the door.
"Claire, are ye alright? Mother told me ye needed to speak to me,"
I turn around and pat on the bed so Jamie lays next to me.
"I- I do need to tell ye something," I say with tears in my eyes.
"Sassenach.. what is it?" He asks worried and he puts his hands on my cheek.
"I don't think I can have children Jamie.. I'm so sorry," I say with regret in my eyes.
"I kent that already Claire," Jamie says smiling.
I sit up in surprise. "How?"
"Geillis, after I came to fetch ye that day, with the lad ye ken. She saw the way I look at ye and she told me that if we ever became something you were probably barren, so that I couldn't get my hopes up,"
"And ye still wanted to marry me?" I ask in disbelief.
"Yes Sassenach, I loved ye back then, I love ye now. And was there ever any prove that ye are barren?"
"Well, I didn't have children with Frank for eight years, but otherwise no. Frank could be barren instead of me," I say coming closer to Jamie.
"Exactly, and ye ken, trying is always nice," he says grinning.
"Trying is indeed always very nice," I say kissing him. "But we should go back."
He sighs. "Aye, and my father and Ian are coming home tomorrow so you'll have to wait a little longer."
I smile. "That's okay, your mother is an absolute darling."
"I ken," he says and takes my downstairs.
"Feeling better?" Jenny asks me.
I nod. "Can I trouble you with some warm water?"
"Aye that would be nice," she says and I help her outside.