Chapter Twenty-One

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    It was bittersweet for Crystal to get back to her own life. For some reason, it felt like she'd spent an entire week at Austin's house. Time seemed to work differently within the walls of his estate. Or maybe it was that time worked differently whenever she was around him. Whatever the case, it was a relief to get back into her condo. It felt good to sink down inside of her own bathtub and just soak away the stress that was Austin Gaines. It also felt good to charge her damned phone so she could see all of the text messages and phone calls she'd missed. Plenty, and no one would hear responses until she was good and ready.

    The longer she spent in her space, the more like herself she felt. She'd broken so many of her own rules with that man. It was no wonder that she was feeling out of sorts, when she wasn't even sticking to her own code.

    After her bath, she passed out - with her cell phone in her hand, even though she wasn't responding to anyone. Her dreams were as hot of a mess as her real life. They were a combination of actual memories of fucking Austin and some fantasy where she threw all of the rules she'd known aside so that she could try having a God's honest relationship with him. From the way she bolted upright with her skin covered in sweat, you'd think she'd had a nightmare about the Candyman or clown from IT. Relationship. Scary.

    Relationships meant trusting someone. If there was anything that her experiences had taught her, it was that the vast majority of men couldn't be trusted. There were a few good ones out there, but Austin didn't seem like one of the good ones. He kind of seemed like an arrogant dick who showed just the right amount of sensitivity to weaken even the strongest women.

    Or maybe that's what I'm telling myself to try to keep from falling further in...

    She drew her knees up to her chest and pouted. I'm not falling in...with anyone. I'm just... going through a little something right now. I'll get over it. I'll get over it and come back even stronger before.

    Her phone lay discarded near her feet. She reached over, grabbed it, and started responding to the messages she'd missed.

~~~~~~

    One of the messages Crystal received was from Justin. The text was simple. He kept it short and sweet, asking if she had any plans for tonight. The truth of the matter was, she'd forgotten that he even existed. She'd forgotten that she'd spent time with him shortly before stumbling across Austin in front of that club.

    Justin was an assignment, and she'd forgotten that he'd even existed. She spent one night with a man and forgot that the rest of the world was still out there somewhere, beyond his gated property.

    She typed in a reply advising that she didn't have any plans for that evening.

Text message to Justin:

P.S...I'm impressed that you remembered to message me. You get bonus points for that.

Text message from Justin:

You sell yourself short. Of course I was going to message you.

    In addition to his text, there were also messages from the woman who'd hired her.

Text message from Nicole:

Hi Crystal, it's Nicole...are there any updates? Has Justin contacted you at all? I'm sorry to be so naggy, but this whole thing is driving me crazy. Get back to me when you can.

Text message to Nicole:

Initial contact has been made, and he's shown interest. Nothing significant to report at this time, but things are progressing.

    She tossed her phone back on the bed, stood up, and stretched. As much as she loved her condo, she'd never realized just how empty it felt. Especially compared to Austin's home, which should have felt significantly more empty than hers. But at his place, there was the sense that another heart was beating somewhere close to hers, whereas in this condo, she was alone completely. Being alone never bothered me before, she thought irritably. So why is it bothering me now?

~~~~~~

    "Because you're pussy whipped already."

    Austin's eyebrows shot up. "Excuse me?"

    "You're walking around, sulking and shit, because you gave her the power to bruise your ego."

    "Nah, you're reading too much into it." Austin sat on the couch at the back of the studio, leaning back with his hands locked behind his head. "I'm just not used to women walking out on me."

    "It's usually the other way around, right?" the skinny, dark-skinned producer asked him. "You're usually the one slipping out in the night, leaving them cute little notes thanking them for time spent." He cackled and turned back to the sound board.

    Austin rolled his eyes, but couldn't help smiling. "I'm not proud of my past actions."

    "I can see that, from the big ass grin you've got on your face," the producer remarked, still cackling.

    "Those were my younger years."

    "A.K.A. a few months ago," the producer supplied.

    "A.K.A. this is different," Austin mocked, staring up at the ceiling. "She's different. She's not like any other woman I've ever met before."

    The producer, whose name was BoiGenius, shrugged his shoulders. "Then make something happen with her."

    "Not that simple."

    "Because she just wants a fuck buddy."

    "Right."

    BoiGenius shook his head. "We live in some weird ass times, man."

    "Tell me about it."

    "Desperate to feel a connection, but ultimately disconnected. Women and men claiming to want a good person in their lives, but no goodness detected."

    Austin hoisted an eyebrow at him.

    "Women and men wanting a ten but when evaluating their own situation, no ten is reflected. So we all just sit in our cribs on our own, feeling alone and neglected. Shit is crazy."

    "You need to put that to pen and paper," Austin told him, his tone serious.

    BoiGenius shrugged. "That's just off the top. The serious state of our society today. Using phones to connect, not realizing that all these phones are doing is causing disconnect. Or even worse, knowing that the phones are causing disconnect, but still keeping their faces buried in their phones anyway."

    "Technology isn't really her problem," Austin said, stroking his chin. His phone was going off, buzzing like crazy in his pocket. The only people calling him were people he didn't want to talk to. The one person he wanted to talk to had gone back to not giving him the time of day.

    "You're right," BoiGenius said, his hand freezing above the sound controls. He cued up a bass-heavy, haunting beat. "Technology isn't her problem, but something else is. She's cynical and withdrawn. Avoids true intimacy. People who do that often have been hurt or want to make sure that no one hurts them. They don't like feeling vulnerable. They like to feel control. So maybe what you have to do to get her is to make her feel like she's the one in control."

    "I'm used to having the control, though."

    "Then I guess the question you need to ask yourself is, how badly do you want her?" BoiGenius queried. "Are you willing to give up control just to keep her around, or do you like to be in control so much that you're willing to let a good one slip by?"

    Austin groaned in frustration and covered his eyes with balled fists.

    "You were the one who pointed out that the things worth it in this life are a damned headache, man," BoiGenius said, turning back to his sound controls. "Nothing worth it is easy, right?"

    "I guess," Austin said. "One thing I know for sure: your producer name is not false advertisement."

    BoiGenius grinned while tweaking the audio that was playing over the studio speakers.

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