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NOW.

It's New Year's Eve, and with the exception of the train ride to and from Cheongju, Chaewon hasn't spoken to Yunjin since the night of the dance showcase.

Not because she doesn't want to, but because every time she opens her KakaoTalk chat with Yunjin she gets halfway through typing before realising she doesn't even know how to talk to Yunjin anymore.

Do you want to get lunch—

How was your Christmas—

I miss you so much—

She deletes all of them, and then shoves her phone into her pocket or under her pillow. Somewhere out of sight.

Chaewon doesn't even want to go to the stupid party Joohyun and Seulgi are throwing tonight.

She would be more than content to just stay in her apartment, binge watching both seasons of Love Live! from under a mountain of blankets and inhaling her body weight in ice cream, rather than spend the evening surrounded by happy stable couples doing things like kissing at midnight and cuddling while watching the fireworks and not sleeping with their best friend who they've been in love with for ages.

She says as much to Ryujin — well, she paraphrases slightly — who just hums in response since she's obviously not listening, before she seems to notice that Chaewon is still in sweatpants and a hoodie at five in the afternoon and that she's serious about not going.

Ryujin just looks at her silently and a little judgmentally before typing something on her phone, and then fifteen minutes later Heejin (and her biceps) and Hyunjin (and her intimidating blank stare) show up to threaten Chaewon until she agrees to unwrap herself from her cocoon of blankets on the sofa and get dressed.

It probably won't even be that bad, Chaewon tries to reason with herself as Hyunjin manhandles her into a taxi an hour later, like they're still concerned Chaewon will try and make a break for it like an escaped convict. Parties thrown by Joohyun and Seulgi are always packed, so it's not like it's just their small group; there's the entire dance crew, the entire boys dance crew, all of Joohyun's grad school friends and Seulgi's older college friends, Sana and Momo's Japanese squad, Hyunjin's theatre friends, Haseul is bringing Kahei, Ryujin and Yeji are bringing some of their friends, and Jiwoo knows like, everyone, so.

There will be food and music and alcohol, so Chaewon can just show up for long enough to be considered polite, spend her time avoiding Yunjin and Seungwoo , distract herself with all her other friends that she's not in love with, and then she can leave just after the countdown and go home. She can suck it up for the sake of her friends, who don't need Chaewon to bring the mood down on what's supposed to be a night of celebration because she's too busy moping.

It'll be fine.

Who knows. She might even have fun.

/

Chaewon knows the second she trails after Heejin, Hyunjin and Ryujin into Joohyun and Seulgi's apartment that she is not going to have fun, because the first thing she sees is Yunjin. And not just Yunjin, but Yunjin-and-Seungwoo.

They're with a group of people that Chaewon doesn't recognise, presumably some of Joohyun's friends or guys from the dance team. Seungwoo has bright purple hair that's easy enough to spot from a distance, and Yunjin is standing next to him, her hair loose and wavy, wearing a backless black dress that makes Chaewon's breath catch in her throat.

It's quite impressive really, the way her stupid heart has been battered so many times and yet still manages to speed up at the sight of Yunjin. The apartment is full of people, noisy with the sound of chatter and one of Seulgi's twelve-hour party playlists, but when Yunjin turns her head, catches sight of Chaewon through the crowd and gives her an unsure, tentative smile, it's like the rest of the world melts away.

all my nights taste like gold / purinzWhere stories live. Discover now