Features || Junhan

38

"Nari, you need to go on hiatus now." My mom says over the phone. My shoulders drop as I take a seat on the sofa in Celestial's studio.

"What..?" I mumble. "Why? What's happening?"

"Yuki called me earlier telling me that she saw you coughing a lot while also holding your chest, that's a sign that your heart is getting worse."
"I was choking on water!" I lie with a frown, I then let out a deep sigh. "Mom, please. I want to do what I love most before I die."

"I'm not letting you die, Nari." My mom says sternly. "I'm still on the search for heart donors and I'm going to update you once I find one."

"Can I still work then? I'm currently helping this new trainee band practice for their debut soon."  I then begin to play with the strings of my pants to distract me from the silence. My mom then hums.

"As long as you promise me you take it easy. Don't overwork yourself and take care." She sighs. I nod my head and hum with a smile on my face. "I love you, Nari."

"I love you too, mom." I say as I then end the call, putting my phone back in my jacket pocket as I let a deep sigh out, tears then going down my face while my lips slightly quivered.

I'm dying. My heart is getting worse day by day and apparently my mom is currently having no luck with finding a donor. The medications are slowly adding up a bit more to the point that I sometimes feel like I'm about to overdose from the amount of pills I'm taking in.

I only have a few months left to live, and I don't know when my day is.

Besides the point that being Celestial's Jj is stressful and sometimes makes me want to die, I still want to continue being Celestial's Jj. I still want to be the Jj that both the members and fans love. I want to be able to play the guitar and put a story behind my music.

I still want to be Xdinary Heroes producer and composer. I want to be able to share more laughs with them and make more memories with them.

I'm still young and should be able to live life like how I wanted. It shouldn't be cut short just because of some stupid heart condition.

I sigh deeply as I stand up from the sofa, then leaving the studio while using my sleeves to wipe the tears from my eyes.

"Nari?" I then hear from behind me. I him as I then around, seeing Junhan looking at me with a frown.  He closes the door to a vocal practice room as he fixes his guitar bag on his back. "Are.. you ok?"
I nod my head as I sniffle a bit, smiling as I laugh it off. He then walks closer to me with furrowed eyebrows.

"It's just allergies don't worry." I lie as I laugh, looking around while trying to also hide my red eyes. "There's a lot of dust here.."

I was then stunned when Junhan wrapped his arms around me, resting his chin on my shoulder as he pats my back softly.
"I've known you long enough to know when you're having an allergy or crying." He mumbles. I then break down into tears as I hug him back, wrapping my arms around his neck as I let the tears fall.

Junhan then breaks the hug as he uses his thumb to wipe my tears, then grabbing my wrist and pulling me towards the elevators.

"Come on, I'll bring you to the place that I go to whenever I'm feeling down." He smiles as he lets me on the elevator first, then following me in and pressing the button to go to the rooftop.

Seems like we both go here whenever we're down..