𝐊𝐈𝐖𝐈 | paul mescal

003,

KIWI
act one, chapter three

THE SUN IS BRIGHT, far, far too bright. The ball of fire in the sky is shining through the curtains that I forgot to close last night.

Curtains that I would get up and close If I didn't have an arm wrapped around my naked torso with a surprisingly strong grip that I can't worm my way out of.

I have no idea what time it is, or in fact what day it is, I have no idea what is going on beyond the fact that Paul Mescal is lying beside me after a very productive night and early morning ( cough cough).

And I know nothing beyond the fact that I need to diffuse this situation as quickly as possible. So I crawl out the covers and slip under his arm so he confuses me for the pillow I've placed beside him.

And for a few seconds I stand there. Staring at the man asleep in my hotel bed ( the first time I've been in this predicament for a long long time) — my hands clasped over my mouth as I silently scream into, wondering what I'm actually going to do. I can't get Florence, I'm not a child who's been sick in the middle of the night.

I am a grown woman who has had a one night stand with an extremely hot Irish man. come on Vittoria you need to sort this out!

But evidently there's not enough time for me to create said master plan as I hear a small grumble and when I turn my head a pair of tired eyes are looking me up and down ( yes, I am infact still naked).

" good morning to you too." he speaks in such a raspy tired manner that makes my skin heat up as I turn my head and reach into the suitcase that sits on a holder at the end of the bed.

" we can't do that again." I tell him, throwing on a hoodie and some shorts. He gives me a look that I meet after trying to avoid his eyeline.

he sits up, leaning on his arms as he watches me "why not? I thought it was pretty good." he tells me and I nod as I continue pacing.

" it was good, mind blowing-ly so." I say, maybe a with little too much enthusiasm because it's not helping my case whatsoever, which Paul clearly picks up upon.

" so..what exactly is the problem?" he asks again, and he doesn't understand and I don't expect him to.

The way I lead my life is not something I don't necessarily understand, but it's made me successful and made me known in the ways I want ( aka for my work and not who's arm
I hang off ) to so I stick by it.

I don't say anything, instead continue my pacing up and down as I grow more and more anxious as my brain conflicts with itself and I don't realise how bad it must look to people other than me as I've only ever done this alone in my bedroom back in London.

" hey, calm down." somewhere between it all, Paul gets out of the bed and moves to me before be slings his arm around my neck and pulls me into him. I exhale and the curled index finger of his other hand lifts up my chin to look at him.

I look at him for a few seconds, and then he leans in and I want to pull away and know I need to stop this before it gets worse but I don't — instead I purse my lips in preparation for his own. Which come delicately, my eyes flutter close and I wish I could have this — if not with him, then with someone. But maybe I'd like to have it with him.

But then again, I don't date. I have my reasons — I have my plan. So when I pull away and he lulls a small groan but our foreheads are still pushed together, I shake my head softly.

" and we can't do that again either." I whisper, then his arms falls slack and is moved back to his side and his face pulls away from mine.

He's upset, angry possibly — I would be too if I were him. He picks up his clothes from my hotel room floor, slipping parts on and then it's his suit jacket which he picks off the floor and slings over his shoulder and gives me a look

" goodbye Vittoria." he hums, yet doesn't move, hoping I'll change my mind and I hope I change my mind too.

After a few seconds I offer a white flag with a small smile " goodbye Paul." I say, and gives a nod and look that signals defeat.

He walks past, the skin of our hands touching as he does so. I don't turn around until he exits the room and the door clicks shut again. And when I do, I hope he didn't leave — that it was test.

But it wasn't, and I'm stood there for a few seconds not knowing what exactly I've just done.
Climbing back into the bed slightly somber  and finding my phone as I turn it on for the first time since early last night.

GROUPCHAT:
british invasion 🇬🇧

taron
seriously, florence check on her is she dead?

liv
Has she answered a single message since last night!!

will
her mum even called me, asking if I'd heard off of her....

vittoira
I am not dead!!

vittoria
just extremely EXTREMELY hungover!

simone
ANSWER YOUR PHONE YOU IDIOT!!

will
now we know you're alive

will
congrats on the Darcy x

liv
although, we already said that but like ten hours ago...

vittoria
blame the server who kept filling up my glass

vittoria
got back to the hotel and totally passed out in my bed

taron
going to throw you a big party when you get home !!

liv
said party was meant to be a surprise, but no longer is

taron
...

vittoria
you guys are so cute and I miss you all x

will
aww she called us cute

simone
and you know she'll take it back!

taron
party when you're back in the motherland?

liv
I'm down...

vittoria
definitely!!

vittoria
got to pop off and make sure Flo knows I'm alive and call of the search party of New York and surrounding areas

vittoria
love you all and see you back in Blighty!! xx

I do eventually get out of my small mope and cross into Florence's room, I lie and tell her I just left early because I drank too much. I don't tell her about Paul because she knows me better than anyone knows me, including myself. And she'd pick up on the fact I slept with someone, and she'd question whether it was time to put my little plan aside and live when life tells me to (aka, go and find the hot Irishman and kiss him or whatever the moment makes me do).

So I don't, and I crawl into her bed and watch American shows and eat copious amounts of trash food. And I try to forget Paul, because it's better that way.

AUTHORS NOTE.

I'm back!!
vote & comment x