TRIPLET DESIRE: 001

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“You are married?” I screamed into the phone, wincing when the harsh sound reverberated through the room but continued speaking anyways. “You are fucking married?”

“Watch your language with me Hannah-”

“The hell I will." I scoffed, folding my arms as I glared at my mother. "How on earth did you get married and your only daughter doesn't know shit about it?

“Hannah….” She trailed off and I could just imagine the sheepish look on her face. I stood in my living room, holding my phone to my ears, my brows furrowed in anger. I could imagine how I looked. My caramel brown hair was tied up in a bun, and bright brown eyes filled with concern.

“A whole week Mom! You've been married for one week and you're just telling me now?"

“Baby," She said soothingly, "You have to calm down. Panicking won't do you any good, okay?.”
I frowned at her words, forcing myself to breathe in and out. She was right though. I was panicking. I could already feel the walls closing in on me.

"Mom,"

“Listen to me baby. Hannah," She sighed, her voice heavy with emotion. "I wanted to tell you. Really I did."

"But?" I could sense the 'but' already and honestly, I had a niggling feeling why she had held out on me for a week.

"I didn't want to burden you with the news. I thought it would be easier if you found out gradually."

Even though I expected it, her words stunned me nonetheless. Gradually? What the hell did she mean 'gradually'? Who finds out about a marriage 'gradually'? My hands gripped the device tightly and I closed my eyes to steady my heavy breathing.

"You should have just told me" I finally managed to mumble, trying to ignore the voice in my head that encouraged me to lose my shit. It felt like a betrayal.

"I didn't want to overwhelm you, sweetheart," she replied gently "After everything you've been through, I thought it was best to ease you into it. I-I wanted to protect you, Hannah. I did not know how you would take it, considering…you know what, I'm sorry. I made a mistake."

I sighed heavily, my hands trembling as I eased my grip on the phone. I understood her. Her first marriage did not exactly go well for me… or any of us, so it was quite normal for her to worry.

"I appreciate your concern, Mom," I said, trying to find my voice amidst the swirling emotions. "I need some time to process everything. I promise I'll visit soon and we can talk more about it."

"Of course, Hannah. Take all the time you need. I know it's hard for you but I would really love to see you again. I love you, okay?"

“I love you too mum," I murmured in reply, slowly feeling pacified. "I will be back as soon as I can."

“Well you better. I cannot wait for you to meet Alexander," She gushed.  "He is the best and he is excited to meet you,”

I could swear I heard my heart pounding wildly in my ears and once again I closed my eyes, chanting in my head.

Not every man will be like Nathaniel, Hannah. Not every man is Nathaniel.
Breathe in. Breathe out.

“I know this will not be easy for you” Mum’s voice interrupted my racing thoughts. "And I am so sorry that you have to go through this. If it were up to me, I would have avoided it completely, but the moon goddess always has other plans.”

Sure she did, I almost snorted in reply. Instead, I swallowed down my retort and tried to speak as calmly as possible.

“Seriously mum, please do not worry. I will be fine. I am healing and I cannot exactly ask you to put your life on hold for me, right?"

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