"Say it, Elena" he says into my ear then takes my ear lobe between his teeth. I nod again, this time harder. "I need you to say it baby, out loud so I know you really want me to" His hand travels down and under his t-shirt that I am wearing.
"I want to" I rush the words and he smiles against my neck, his mouth continuing his gentle assault. He doesn't say anything, instead he grabs my thigh, lifting me higher onto his torso and begins to walk out of the water. As he reaches the bank he lets me go and I whine, inflaming his ego even more but I don't care. All I know is that I want him, I need him. He reaches out for my hands and pulls me up onto the bank with him.
I just stand on the grass, Stefan's shirt is heavy and soaked with water. "Do you want it to be here? Or my room?" He asks and I shrug. I don't want to go to his room because the drive there will give me too much time to overthink what I am about to do.
"Here" I say and look around. There is no one in sight and I pray that no one will come here.
"Eager?" He smiles and I roll my eyes. The heat in my body is slowly burning out the longer Stefan's touch is not on me. "Come here" he says in a low voice and the heat returns.
My feet pad quietly across the soft grass and I stop only inches from Stefan. His hands immediately reach for the hem of his soaked t-shirt and he peels it off of my body. The way he looks at me alone drives me crazy, my hormones are out of control. My pulse speeds up as he looks my body up and down one more time before taking my hand.
"Lay down on the shirt" he says and moves down to the ground with me. He lays me onto the wet shirt and leans himself up on his elbow to hold his weight so he is laying on his side, facing me as I lay on my back. My hands move up to cover my body, Stefan sits up and grabs both of my wrists and pushes them down to my sides.
"Don't even cover up, not for me" he says and looks into my eyes.
"It's just.." I begin to explain but he cuts me off.
"No, you will not cover up, you have nothing to be ashamed of Elena" does he mean that? "I mean it, look at you" he says, seeming to read my mind.
"You've been with so many girls" I point out and he frowns.
"None like you" I could take his answer many different ways but I choose to let it go.
"Do you have a condom?" I ask him.
"A condom?" He chuckles. "I'm not having sex with you" he says and I begin to panic. Is this all a game to humiliate me?
"Oh" is all I say, I begin to pull myself up but he grabs my shoulders and gently pushes me back down.
"Where are you going?" Realization hits him, "Oh.. no I didn't mean it like that, I just meant that we aren't going to have sex today." He said and I feel a little bit of the pressure in my chest dissolve.
"There are many other things I want to do to you first" he says in my ear and climbs on top of me, all of his weight supported on his hands. He is in a push-up position, his wet hair drips water droplets onto my face and I squirm.
He shifts his body to lay on his side once again. He brings his hand to my neck and trails it down, only touching me with his fingertips, then down the valley of my breasts, down my stomach and he stops just above my panties. We are really doing this, me and Stefan. A hundred thoughts race through my mind but disappear as soon as his hand reaches into my panties. I hear him suck a breath through his teeth and he brings his mouth to mine.
"Does that feel good?" He asks into my mouth. I nod and he slows his fingers down.
"Does it feel better than when Matt does it?" He asks.
"Does it?" He asks again.
"No." I manage to say even though I have no control of my body or mind right now.
He goes back to kissing me and his fingers keep moving up and down. "You're so responsive to me, so wet" he says and I moan. Why are these filthy words so hot when Stefan says them? I feel a gentle pinch and it sends a shock through my whole body.
I feel him do it again and my back arches off of the grass. His mouth travels down to my neck, then my chest. His tongue dips down under the cup of my bra and his hand massages the other. I feel a pressure building in my stomach and it is pure bliss. I pinch my eyes closed and bite down on my lip, my back lifts off the grass once again and my legs begin to shake.
"That's right Elena, come for me" he says and I feel like I am spiraling out of control. "Look at me baby" he purrs and I open my eyes, and look at him, the sight of his mouth nipping the skin on my chest sends me over the edge and my vision goes white for a few seconds. "Stefan" I repeat and I can tell by the way his cheeks flush that he loves it. He pulls his hand out and rests it on my stomach as I try to return my breathing to normal.
"I'll give you a minute to recover" he laughs to himself and moves away from me. I frown, I want him to stay close. After the best few minutes of my life I sit up and look towards Stefan. He has his jeans and shoes on.
"We are leaving already?" The embarrassment clear in my voice. I had assumed he would want me to touch him too.
"Yea, you wanted to stay longer?"
"I just thought. I thought maybe you would want something.." I said.
"Oh, no. I am okay, for now" he says and gives me a small smile. Is he going to go back to being mean again? I hope not, not after this. I won't be able to stand it if he treats me terribly again. He did say 'for now' so he wants something later. I am already starting to regret this. I put my clothes on over my wet bra and panties and try to ignore the wetness between my thighs. Stefan picks up his wet shirt and hands it to me.
He takes in my confused expression and says, "to wipe off" oh. I unbutton my pants and he doesn't bother to turn around as I do what he recommended and hand him his shirt back. He doesn't seem bothered by it as he Carries the shirt in his hand while I step into my shoes. The air around has changed from passionate to distant and I find myself wishing to be as far away from him as possible.
I wait for him to talk to me as we walk back to the car, but he doesn't. My mind is already coming up with every possible worst case scenario that will occur next. He opens my door for me and I nod to thank him.
"Is something wrong?" He asks me while he drives back down the gravel road.
"I don't know. Why are you being so weird now?" I ask him, even thought I am afraid of his answer.
"I'm not, you are"
"No, you haven't said a word to me since.. you know"
"Since I gave you an orgasm?" He finishes for me and my mouth drops. Why am I surprised by his dirty mouth?
"Uhm, yea. Since that, you haven't said anything. You just got dressed and we left. It makes me feel like you're using me or something" honestly seems to be the best option right now.
"What? Of course I am not using you. To use someone I would have to be getting something out of it" he says and I feel the tears coming. I do my best to swallow them back but one escapes.
"Are you crying? What did I say?" He reaches over and puts his hand on my thigh. To my surprise it soothes me. "I didn't mean it like that, I am sorry. I am not used to whatever is supposed to happen after messing around with someone, plus I wasn't going to just drop you off at your room and go our separate ways, I thought maybe we could get some dinner or something? I am sure you're starving" he smirks and squeezes my thigh gently.
I smile back at him, I am relieved by his words. I don't know what it is about Stefan that makes me so emotional, in every way possible. The idea of him using me makes me more upset than it should and for the first time since he picked me up I remember I have a boyfriend. My feelings for Stefan are so confusing, I hate him one minute and want to kiss him the next. He makes me feel things I never knew I could, not just sexually. He makes me laugh and cry, yell and scream, but most of all he makes me feel alive.
