Ambition: A Poetry Anthology

Crime

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There's a book I'm keep-

Ing deep in my heart.

I touch the pages

But never start

To read through the words,

Images they make

I don't want to see,

Don't want to remake,

To form in my mind

And live through once more;

I've tossed out the key

That opened that door.

I try to move on;

I try to forget,

To never go back,

Be stronger than it,

The pull of my soul

To evil it fears,

The questions I brew

That draw me to near

That book that I fear,

The past tucked away,

Not written but held

In words I can't say

That still hold me back

From all that I dream,

'Cause I can't move on,

Can't break myself free,

Can't cut off the string

And how I'm compelled

To run right to it,

The shadow I tell

Myself to avoid.

It enraptures me.

So scared by the truth,

I simply must see

Just where it will lead,

Although I know well;

The sky has gone red;

I'm running towards hell

Somewhere down that road,

Past gates I lock now,

But when I've returned,

I never have plowed

My way through the guards

I never did place,

'Cause I left a way

Open, just in case

I wanted once more

To pleasure in sin

I know will wreck me

Before I begin,

And still I engage;

I'm desperate for joy;

I'm desperate for life,

Desperate for the ploy

That brightens my night

For only a flash

Of time that I clutch,

Mistakes made in rash

Choices I don't think

Through in the moment.