incorrect quotes (ships)

190 5 8

by LennyLemon31

by LennyLemon31

Yellow: Wow, they really hate us.
Red: Yes, perhaps they're homophobic.
Yellow: But we're not gay, Red.
Red:
Yellow:
Red: We're not?
(Omg McDonald's)

Blue: Green, I...
Blue: I love you!
Green: Not my problem.
(DAMN GREEN-)

Purple: Why are your tongues purple?
Yellow: We had slushies. I had a blue one.
TSC: I had a red one.
Purple: oh.
Purple:
Purple: OH.
Red:
Red: You drank eachothers slushies?
(... no comment-)

Yellow, about TSC and Red: My god, would you two just get a room already?
Red: Excuse me, Yellow?
Yellow: You both just keep agreeing about horrifying things and relishing everybody else's misery. So seriously, when's the wedding?
TSC: ...
Blue: I ship it!
(The weddings on friday)

TSC: *yawns*
Blue: Yeah, being that pretty must be tiring.
TSC: Then you must be exhuasted.
Red: Will you two shut up? Some of us are lonely.
(Rip red)

Green: Red, take out the trash.
Red: Sure, Blue, will you go out on a date with me?
(Red-venge)

Yellow: Come on, Purple. Nobody actually believes that Blue is in love with me.
Purple, to The Squad: Raise your hand if you think that Blue is helplessly in love with Yellow.
*Everyone raises their hand*
Yellow: Blue, put your hand down.
(Keep your hand up)

Green: Since we're in a relationship now, your clothes are my clothes too. Don't ask me why I have your shirt on, this is our shirt.
TSC: Fine, but when I come strutting in with your fuzzy socks I don't want to hear shit.
(I want fuzzy socks)

Yellow: Do you love Red?
Green: Yeah, I do.
Yellow: TSC! I told you I knew it! You owe me 100 bucks!
TSC: We all love Red. You should've asked if they were IN love with them.
Green: I thought that was implied.
TSC: ...
Yellow: ...
Green, looking straight at TSC: Congrats Yellow, you just won 100 bucks.
(Christmas)

Green: Let's watch Sharkboy and Lavagirl.
Blue: Okay.
Green: And make out during the scary parts.
Blue: Th-
Blue: The scary parts.
Blue: Of Sharkboy and Lavagirl.
(Yes. The scary parts.)

Blue: Two bros!
Yellow: Chillin' in a hot tub!
Blue and Yellow, in unison: Zero feet apart 'cause we're GAY AS FUCK!
(Slay kings)

Red, trying to flirt: So, you come around here often?
Purple, confused: I mean, this is my house, so yeah.

Yellow: Hey, about that love letter you sent me-
Blue: *blushes* What are your thoughts?
Yellow: The fourth sentence-
Blue: Yeah, that's where I got really emotional and I-
Yellow: It's "you're" not "your".
(This is cannon/j)

Red: So, what's Green's type?
TSC: Brown eyes, kind, oblivious, good sense of humor, turtle lover.
Red: Sounds kind of like me. Too bad we're just friends.
TSC: Did I mention oblivious?
Red: Yeah, why?
TSC: Okay, just making sure.
(Christmas once again)

Yellow: So... who's the big spoon and who's the little spoon?
Green: We're chopsticks!
Yellow: Well... that's cute!
Yellow: Does that mean you two snuggle together perfectly?
Purple: No, it means that if you take the other away, the only thing the other is good for is stabbing.
(I'm a toothpick)

Blue: And now for a gay update with Green and Purple.
Green: Getting gayer.
Blue: Thank you, Green.

*Yellow is telling a story*
Blue: Wow, Yellow, this story has everything! Action! Adventure! Romance!
TSC: Romance?
Blue: I have a crush on them.

Blue: Talk dirty to me~
Red: Inflation is a serious problem and lumber prices are at a high.
Blue: Wha-
Red: The economy is in shambles.
(Also people are losing their rights faster then you can say "Squirrel")

Green: I have feelings for you.
TSC: Why? What's wrong with you? Are you sure you're okay?

Green: How do I make a date really romantic?
TSC: Be mysterious.
Green: Okay!
*later, while on a date with Purple*
Purple: So where are we going?
Green: None of your fucking business.
(Damn ok, chill)

Yellow: Valentine's day is just a consumerist holiday that holds no real value other than drive people insane buying heart shaped chocolates for their significant others and pos-
Red: I wrote you a poem.
Yellow, already crying: You did?
(Undeniably cute)

Green: Love is weakness and an evolutionary mistake.
TSC: You are literally making a Valentine's day card for Purple.
Green, pointing their hot glue gun towards TSC: You're on thin fucking ice.

Red: Having two partners is both amazing and complicated. But all our problems are solved with communication.
Green: It's my turn to cuddle TSC.
Red: FIVE MORE MINUTES DAMMIT!
(Respect the 5 minutes)

Red: Green is too tall for me to kiss them on the lips. What should I do?
Blue: Punch them in the stomach. Then, when they double over in pain, kiss them.
TSC: Tackle them!
Yellow: Dump them.
Purple: Kick them in the shin!
Green: No to all of those! Just ask me to lean down!!
(Climb him like a tree)

Blue: Yellow, you love me, right?
Yellow: Normally I'd say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere I won't like.
(Blues in trouble... again)

Green: God, if only someone loved me...
Yellow: *standing behind them with roses*
Blue: *holding box of chocolates*
Red: *has balloons and a card*
TSC: *facepalms* This is sad.

Red: Hey, babe, remember how I had to go to the pharmacy to pick up my ADHD meds?
Blue: Yes?
Red: Well, it turns out they're all out for the next five days.
Blue: Fuck.
Red: It's gonna be a fun week!
Blue: I'm going to TSC's house.
Red: Nuh-uh. Through sickness and health, motherfucker.
(The vows never lie)