Heir of Deception

Chapter 37

Della pinched her forearm fighting to stay awake. She was dreading to go back to her room; it was still in shambles. She'd told the maids not to go in there today. The encounter had been awkward, she'd felt that she owed them and explanation but obviously didn't have one at the ready. Thankfully they didn't ask any questions.

That was another thing that Della needed to learn. She had authority, power yet never wielded it. Even if she hadn't grown up as a simple gardener she doubted she would still have the confidence and swagger that her father or Aelin had.

It left her speechless at times, the skill at which Aelin was able to convince others to do her bidding.  Today in fact, she'd learned that in the war against Maeve and Erawan she'd summoned 3 kingdoms to her with nothing in exchange to offer. If that was not a demonstration of power and authority Della didn't know what was.

Standing abruptly Della decided that she could go to the sparring room. Rowan and Aelin had cleverly set up some wards to bounce back magic so that a person could practice offensive and defensive magic simultaneously. Apparently Aelin had used a similar technique when training at Mistward.

Della's study room was tucked away in the corner of the library, she loved getting to walk through the books everyday. Just getting to see the tall stacks made her feel smart, as silly as that sounded.

This late into the night however the library was empty. The tall stacks loomed ominous in the darkness. Combined with the chill it was strangely reminiscent of the forest surrounding Doranelle. She sent out her net of magic wider, using her wind to sense the objects in her surroundings. While Della couldn't tell exactly what was in the room she could get a general sense of the things around her and feel if they moved.

Like she could feel the largeness of bookshelves, she could also sense, something...probably a person near the romance books.

Della hesitated, her usual route took her right past there but she wasn't in the mood to see other people. She abruptly turned taking her on a more circuitous route towards the exit. She'd made it about 10 paces out the door before she heard, " you're not avoiding me are you dearest Della?"

She stifled a groan. "It's not just you I'm avoiding if it's any consolation."

Fenrys gave her a half smile, "I suppose it does. If only slightly." He scanned her, checking for injuries, perhaps. "I was heading to my rooms, care to walk with me?" He asked a little too casually.

"I wasn't headed to bed just yet..." Della had contemplated lying to him but doubted she could fool him.

"Della," he said in an annoyingly stern tone. " It's after midnight."

"I'm not yet tired. I'm fine."

Too fast for her to react, he snatched her wrist holding it out between them. "I don't think 'not tired' people repeatedly pinch themselves to stay awake." He gently brushed his thumb over the red spot on her inner arm. As if trying to soothe the pain away.

Her heart clenched, she blushed. She tried to tug out of his grip but he held her there. "Della, I understand I really do, but working yourself to the bone is not the answer. It won't make you feel better."

Della looked away at the ground, at the walls at anything but him, at his hand holding her. This was not the conversation she wanted to be having. Least of all with him. It weakened her resolve, made her feel too seen.

"Please, rest, let someone help you. If not me then Lysandra or better yet your father."

Della held her tongue, she knew people wanted to support her. But lately a new insecurity had bubbled up.

Everyone here had suffered so much and worked so hard to give people like her a safe world to live in. So this small, failed attempted kidnapping was not worth being so afraid. It was selfish of her really. Compared to what anyone in court had experienced this was nothing. They loved her and the way that she could love them back was by not being a problem.

Even Fenrys, this was just who he was, caring for other people and he cared for her too, she knew that. But there were other people who could use his help and support more. To ask him to guard her every night was unreasonable and the fact that he felt the need to do so was a failure on her part. It had been nearly two months since the attack and so it was time for her to get over it. To stop being such a burden to those around her.

She gave Fenrys a tight smile. "Alright, let's go."

His eyes scanned over her again. Perhaps distrusting her easy acceptance.

He tucked her hand into the crook of his elbow and turned them in the direction of their rooms.

The silence was comfortable as so many things with Fenrys were. Now that Della had acknowledged her exhaustion it sank into her bones. Her feet becoming heavier with each step.

She could hear someone else, feather light steps behind them. Usually she would tense at that, however given she was with Fenrys she felt comfortable turning her brain off. She was safe with him.

Fenrys opened her door for her. Only to be greeted by a cold blast of wind. He whipped his head around to her. It was hard to cringe away from him with her hand still tucked against him.

"They haven't fixed your rooms?" He asked, incredulous.  "It's freezing in here!"

Della resisted the urge to roll her eyes. Of course it was freezing in her rooms. The windows were blown out and no one was allowed in to start a fire.

"It's fine. Really I-"

He cut her off. That's twice now you've told me you're fine when you're clearly not. Come on."

He pulled her door shut and tugged her towards his own. His room really opulent. Deep blues and silvers fine woodworking and a rich tapestry. She wondered if he'd had anything shipped from his home in Doranelle.

"Why would they not take care of your room? This is unbelievable!"

"I asked them to not to," she'd hate for the maids to be scolded for following her instructions.

"Oh, well then." He huffed. Ran a hand through his hair clearly reeling in his anger. He breathed out again, calmer this time. "You can take the bed and I'll sleep out here."

"Oh I- I don't mean to put you out." She said quickly, " my bedroom door works just fine, it will be warm in there." 

He eyed her again. "You did this last night too. Just stay here please Della, you're not an inconvenience to me. I want you to stay, it will help me feel better."

She went back and forth with herself. Whether to push or to relent. In the end she relented. Chances were he'd sleep outside her door and the couch was more comfortable anyways.

She nodded and he followed her into his bedroom. "Do you need to me to grab anything from your room?" He asked as he pulled back the covers and removed the warning pan from between the blankets.

Della blushed, the thought of Fenrys going through the drawers containing all her nightgowns. Her blushed deepened as she remembered he'd seen her like that last night. "No, no I'll be fine."

"You sure?"

Again all she could do was nod. Too embarrassed to look him in the eye.

"Ok then," we strode to his wardrobe pulling from it a shirt. "If you need something then you can use this." He laid it on the bed before stiffly standing in the doorway. "Let me know if you need anything else," he nervously wiped his palms on his thighs nodded once before turning on his heel and striding out the door shutting it behind him.

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