I take in a deep breath and let it out slowly, enjoying every second of it. Breathing is one my of favorite ways of getting through what they taught to be “tough stuff” in the 5th grade. Little did I know that slide was merely the beginning of the “tough stuff” I would go through. Nevertheless, breathing is the main technique I held on to. It's almost over, I tell myself with a smile. Relief overcomes me and a chill runs down my spine. Tomorrow... it's only a day away.
Tomorrow will be the first day of the rest of his eight years in the military. Tomorrow, he will graduate with honors. Tomorrow is the last day he will ever have to spend in basic training. Tomorrow is a great day. I think about how soon tomorrow will become yesterday and how I will smile all day because I know that he made it. I know it takes courage, bravery, strength inside and out, to complete basic training much less with honors. I never knew you could graduate basic training with honors... but if I had, I wouldn't have doubted for one moment that Isaac would graduate without them.
My heart swells I'm so proud of him. With every lingering thought of him, I am more proud. It's not that I can't believe what he's done, because I can. I've always known Isaac to be amazing. I've always known Isaac could do whatever he set his mind to. But, I am impressed nevertheless. He has truly proven it, and I know he will only continue to prove it over the next eight years.
When he instructs everyone to stop writing because the letters wouldn't get there in time, I am surprised at how hard it is for me. Every free moment of my day, every time I am bored for a mere second before moving on in my busy life, every time I see his picture, or hear music we've listened to, or he even just crosses my mind, I want to go sit down at my desk and write a long letter to him. I'm so anxious to get his new address... to hear where he is going next, what position he will fill. My mind swirls with wonder and curiosity. At nighttime, it consumes me; erasing nearly every other worry, thought, concern, or plans from my mind. I just want to write to him. But I can't, so I write about him.
With all the big things happening in my life, I am amazed but not surprised at how Isaac's life is very important inside mine. I guess when you've known somebody since the diaper days, their big life changes are big to you as well. I think about all that I am doing in my life at seventeen. I'm ready to be eighteen, and part of me feels I already am. I'm looking for houses to rent, I'm applying for side-jobs to help support me while I write, I'm going to move out and away from my family. I am seeking independence and responsibility that I have never known before, or could possible fathom before experiencing it. But I am ready... that is what I want – nay – what I need. I need experience... I crave responsibility and independence. I am ready to make my life decisions and create my own path. I will embrace the good and the bad while learning from both. And then, I think of what Isaac is doing, and it makes my life, and what I am doing, small.
Perception is a funny thing, and it is incredible what it will do. To think, I am doing all this and many people think I'm crazy, ambitious, and very excited and proud of me, but I wouldn't last one week doing what Isaac has already accomplished. Reality check: contrary to popular belief, the world doesn't revolve around me. No, I'm really not that vain, I don't think the world revolves around me and I never have. It's just huge to think about: I'm doing something amazing, and then someone right next to me is doing something even more amazing. It makes me realize how lucky I am to be who I am with the true friends I have; especially Isaac.
Tomorrow is a big day, and I wish with all my heart and soul that I could be there for him. But that's not the way life works. People think true friends are supposed to be there for everything. The reality is, true friends try and want to be there for everything. But, even when they can't make it, true friends understand and feel the other's presence there. Because one thing is for sure: although I won't be there in person, I will be there in his heart. I will smile and congratulate him. My heart will hug his, and he will know I care. He will know how proud of him I am; how impressed and inspired he has made me. He will know I am thinking of him all day long. He will know all this, smile back, and I will know he knows.
True friends can go months without talking, pick up the phone and call the other without an apology or receiving a guilt trip from the other. True friends are there for each other when most needed, even if it's just a text or a phone call. True friends spend as much time together as they can, when they can, but expect nothing. Isaac is a true friend and he always has been. We've been there for all of the other's milestones, but only in heart. I look forward to the day when I can be there in person, but for now, the heart is a strong bond.
There's no way to truly express my connection with Isaac. It can't be explained; it is the ineffable. All I know is that he is very special to me and a big part of my life. He's an astounding person, and an even greater friend. I am blessed in many ways, and grateful for so much in my life, and Isaac is a person that I feel will always be my friend. I am very blessed and grateful for him. He is family in my heart. He inspires me, he challenges me, he cares about me and I care about him. I'm always here for him and vice versa. We don't bother each other with the petty problems of life, or the drama of being a teenager; we are here for the real things that come up, the important ones. We're real friends. And yeah, we have a lot of fun together, but we can also talk to each other. Which, in my opinion, are the best friends to have. People go their whole lives without knowing what it feels like to have a true friend. I'm so lucky to not be one of those people.
