.𖥔 ݁ ˖˚☽˚｡⋆
the words are quiet. almost a whisper - or something you would only catch underneath someones breath, in the passing, maybe.
but the way rakim is peering down at him, expression morphed, all of a sudden, tells tyler all he needs to know.
he doesnt feel the same way.
"just forget it," tyler quickly stammers, feeling shame and regret wash over him. why didnt he keep quiet? he just had to open his mouth.
"..what?" rakim says. tyler doesnt wanna look up at him. but hes not a pussy. so he does. and rakims smiles been ripped away from his face, and his brows are furrowed, and hes staring at tyler like hes some fucking alien.
the feeling is terrible. it feels like hes just been stripped naked - and the whole fucking world is watching him. but its not the whole fucking world. its rakim. and just rakim. and tyler doesnt understand how one single person hes known for a few weeks is able to make him feel like this.
he gets up. he doesnt wanna feel small. but then rakim comes closer, and its not like hes towering over him, but tylers still scared. his hearts beating so hard against his chest that it hurts.
"your gay?" rakim finally blurts out. he sounds disgusted.
"i said forget it." tyler croaks out, drawing his eyes to the floor.
he can't do this. he wants, no, needs to run away. and he turns round to his door; to maybe sprint out. but its like rakim can read his mind, because he grips at tylers arm as the idea passes his mind.
his nails dig into tylers arm. he yelps. it hurts. everything hurts.
"i cant just - just forget that?!" rakim spits out. "you cant just tell me that - and then take it back?!"
tyler's never heard rakim yell. hes always been quiet and composed and calm. and hes an entirely different person. and its scary. its really fucking scary. tyler draws his eyes to the floor. he cant look him in the eyes.
"tyler," rakims touch gets harder. "say something."
his vision blurs. god. he regrets everything. he doesnt even know what to make of his feeling anymore. tyler wants to wish him and rakim never met. but he knows that'd be a lie. he wants to scream at the other male but also hold his warm hand.
"tyler." rakim echoes. tyler finally looks up. he thinks jes angry. "fucking talk to me!" rakim yells, squeezing at tylers arm.
"shut the fuck up!" tyler barks, shoving the other male away, and turnimg to his door immediately. he thinks he hears rakim yell something at him, but he cant exactly hear it as hes running down the stairs.
tyler? is that you? his ma.
tyler unlocks the front door, frantically. he needs to get out. it feels like hes suffocating.
tyler - don't fucking leave?! rakim.
its cold. really fucking cold. tylers only wearing a tee and jeans. he doesnt really notice the harsh weather at first, though. theres tears down his face. his minds running with thoughts. all the voices behind him are sinply blurs.
he grabs his bike, and without even thinking of where hes going, takes off.
tyler:FUCK
everything went wrong
rakim doesnt like me back
frank: WTF?
Are you okay?
Call me?
tyler: can i come to ur house
frank: Of course
Everyone else is here btw
tyler: fuck
