I Still Love You

Chapter 3 - Belly

That night Belly couldn't sleep. She didn't know if it was the nerves of getting married or if it was her heart breaking at the thought of Conrad leaving. He left about an hour ago. He's probably halfway to California by now. Steven's words had been ringing in her head all day and now she couldn't get them out.

He'd left. Left without so much as a goodbye. Yes, she didn't want him there at the wedding, but would it have hurt for him to say bye? To wish her luck? I mean it was her wedding after all. It was his brother's wedding! How could he have just left without saying anything to either of them?

Frustrated, she threw the covers off of her body and slipped into her bathing suit. Over the years, her midnight swims had become somewhat sacred to her. It was the only time where the noise in her life didn't seem to matter. The only time where she could feel like a 10 year old again. She tiptoed down the stairs, not wanting to wake anyone up, in no mood for a conversation and slipped out the back door.

The air was cold against her skin and the sound of the ocean was calming. This was her happy place. She could be whoever she wanted here. She took off her slippers and was about to slip off her robe when she saw something shimmering in the moonlight by the sun-lounger.

It was Conrad's sun-lounger. When he realized Belly swam in the middle of the night, he decided to sit with her. It was innocent at first, mostly because he was protective and didn't want anything to happen to her. Later on he realized it was really because he liked having those moments with her. Where it was just the two of them.

Every night she swam, she'd come out of the water to see him sitting there, watching her. It always made her feel warm inside. Like her body was on fire. Over the years it became a tradition. Their tradition.

She walked over to the lounger, dreading what she was going to find. Her heart knew exactly what it was but her brain didn't want to believe it. There was no way he would leave it for her. He'd made sure she knew it wasn't hers, even if she thought otherwise. And he was right. He'd never actually given it to her. She'd presumed and taken it. Just like she had presumed he loved her and that he was always going to be there for her no matter what.

Time moved slowly as she got closer and she could see there was an envelope under the shiny object. She was nervous, her breath was shaky and she could hear her heart pounding in her ears. She kept telling herself whatever it is, it doesn't matter. It's too little too late. Jere's the one who loves you.

She felt her body tremble the closer she got. Her hands were shaking and her heart was racing. She drew in a shaky breath. Her heart was right.

It was the infinity necklace.

She picked it up slowly, afraid that it would disappear if she moved too fast. It's not yours. I never gave it to you. You just took it. She could hear Conrad's words from that night two years ago. That god forsaken night. When he screwed everything up.

Underneath the necklace there was an envelope. It wasn't just any envelope though, it was Susannah's envelope. Susannah had always loved dainty things, so whenever she had the chance to make something look cute and dainty she'd take it.

It was probably the summer Belly turned 12, Laurel had finally decided to make writing something more than a hobby. Susannah was so excited she ran to the stationary store in Cousins and bought everything from pencils and notebooks to glitter pens and paper clips. "Beck, it's 2012 not the 1950's. I can type up my work." Her mother had laughed at Susannah's excitement but that didn't stop her. She demanded Laurel have nice stationary to get her creative juices flowing.

This envelope was one of the few things that were still left from that haul. It was a light blue like the color of the beach house and there were tiny sea shells on the bottom corners of it. It was the perfect beach envelope. In the center, written in Susannah's handwriting was her name.