One Hundred Sleepless Nights

23

~ a year earlier~

I'm used to my phone going off at 4am except usually I know who's calling me. This time I'm getting a call from Unknown Called ID. Usually I would screen it right away, let it go to voicemail and listen to the message immediately after, but something in me tells me to answer it. So I do.

"Hello?" I say into the phone, wiping down the bar counter with one hand.

"Alia?"

My entire body comes to a halt. I think even my brain stops for a couple of seconds in pure shock. I never thought I'd ever hear that voice again.

"Jaime?"

"Y-yeah, its me." he says slowly. "How are you?"

"I'm good." I say as I slide on top of one of the stools. I have a weird feeling that I'll need to sit down for this. "How are you?"

"I'm good." he says. There's an awkward beat of silence for a second, neither of us knowing what to really say. "I don't know if you want to even hear from me, so you can hang up if you want."

"Why would I hang up?" I ask in disbelief. This is all I've dreamt of for years, I can't believe he thinks I'd ever hang up on him.

"I've given you every reason to." he says solemnly. 

"No you haven't." I say softly. "It was me anyways, I was the problem."

"Mom told me she doesn't talk to you anymore." he says.

I'm glad he's not here to see my face flush in embarrassment. 

"Did she tell you why?" I ask even though I know the answer.

"Yeah, she did. Are you still...?"

"No, I'm not." I say quickly. I don't want him to think any less of me. "I quit two years ago."

"Good." he says. "You should tell her that."

I shake my head even though he can't see it. "She doesn't want to see me. I called her after I got out of rehab and she said she needed time still."

"Time heals." he says. "Thats kind of why I'm calling."

I try not to get my hopes up. Its my first time actually hearing my brothers voice in three years so its hard not to feel excited already, but for all I know this could be him calling me to tell me that they kicked me out the family forever and wrote me out the will.

"I want to see you." he says to me. My heart pounds in my chest, an unshakable smile finds its way to my face. "I'm not in the country right now, I'm not even back home until June, but I want to see you when I get back."

"Yeah of course." I say excitedly. "I can't wait."

"Me neither." he says and I can actually hear the smile in his voice. That same Jaime smile that has the same dimples as I do. 

"I figured until we see each other we could text." he says then quickly he adds. "If you want."

"I'd love that." I say. I'm full on beaming at this point. 

"And, uh, I'm sorry. For what I said, and for how I was these last couple of years."

"We don't need to do that, Jaime." I say, not wanting to ruin the moment. "It was never your fault anyways."

"It wasn't just yours. But you're right, we can do this when we see each other, for now I just want to hear about you. Whats my sister been up to?"