Devoted

4 🌙

Jackson, MS
The Weekend
At Xavier's Apartment

Kemari Avani Pierson

"Um, can I talk to you for a second?" I asked him nervously.

He looked me up and down. Syx glanced at everyone else then looked down at the counter as if he was debating stepping to the side with me. He lifted his head and looked directly into my eyes. He let out a small sigh before nodding his head.

I grabbed his hand and instantly felt his body tense. Touching his hand lit a fire in me that made my skin tingle. I haven't been this close to Syx in 2 years.

I led him to the balcony. I let go of his hand and closed the door. He leaned against the wall and I walked towards the railing. I nervously fiddle with my fingers as he observed my every move.

"I miss you Syx." I looked down at my hands. "I miss you a lot" My voice cracked.

I turned around now facing him. His eyes softened as he gazed into my watery ones.

"I don't want to spend another anniversary by myself Syx. You're Khalan's father, you should've been at the graveyard with me." A few tears ran down my face. "I need you there with me, please"

A moment of silence passed and I was starting to get irritated. It felt like I was having a conversation with a brick wall.

"Say something" I plead.

He took slow strides towards me. I was confused at first. I was even more confused when he wrapped his arms around me and buried his face into the crook of my neck.

"I miss you too Kemari" he whispered.

I hugged him back and rested my head on his shoulder. We held each other for a while as I silently shed more tears.

"Is your nigga going to be okay with this?" He mumbled. He buried his face further into my neck and tightened his hold on my waist.

I rolled my eyes at his question. "I'm not with Armon anymore"

"I'm going to kill him when I see him, you know that right?"

"Please don't." I chuckled and let him go.

He lifted his head but rested his hands on my waist.

"Sooo, are we cool now?" I asked Syx with a small smile.

"Not yet." He used one hand to wipe my tears away. "You know we have a lot to talk about."

I sighed and looked down.

"Unt unt, don't do that." Syx lifted my chin up with his middle and index finger. "Do you want to talk about the petty shit first or something serious?"

"Petty" I answered. Petty would be easier.

"Alright." Syx removed his hands from me and took a few steps back.

I frowned at the lost of contact.

"Fix your face." He smirked which made me flip him off.

"I'm going to get straight into the point, I stopped talking to you when you got with Armon." He made eye contact with me. "It hurts seeing the girl you're in love with being with the dude she told you not to worry about." He admitted.

"To be honest, I don't even know what I was thinking when I started dating him." I shook my head. I closed my eyes as all the bad memories from that relationship flowed through my mind. "I'm so sorry, Syx. I did what I felt was right in the moment. I do regret dating him though."

"Why?" Syx questioned.

"He was toxic and a cheater." I told him.

Wait, was Syx with anyone after me?

Jealousy filled my heart just thinking about that. "Were you in a relationship after we broke up?" I voiced the random thought.

"I tried to make some work but none of them were you" he told me. "That sounds corny as hell but it's the truth" he shrugged.

I smiled at his honesty.

"We have to move on Syx." I sighed.

"I know" He huffed and looked at the floor. "But I don't want too" he uttered.

"I want to be with you. I want us to be together so bad Syx, but you have to leave that street shit alone." I took a few steps towards him and gently grabbed his hand.

"After I kill Dante, I'm done with this shit" he lifted his head up and held my other hand. "I promise"

"I'll hold you to that." I looked up at him. "Now let's talk about something else."

"I heard you were drinking lean. You're not stupid Syx. Why would you drink that shit knowing damn well that it will put you six feet under?" I asked him.

"To ease the pain. After Khalan died, I was so fucked up in the head. I just wanted everything to stop or at least slow down. I was losing a battle with my demons Kemari."

"I was supposed to be in the ground, not our baby. Our kid didn't even get to see a stray of light before he passed away." He poured his heart out as his eyes teared up.

"I know we will never get over our son's death but we can't sit here and act like you didn't damn near die" I mumbled. "Like you wasn't shot twice in the chest and your heart didn't stop."

"But I was revived Kemari-"

"Because the doctors and God brought you back Syx" I looked at him. "Khalan was already dead, there was no chance for our baby Syx. When I found out that your heart stopped, the world stopped spinning. Syx you were technically dead for 3 minutes. I thank God everyday for giving you back to me even when we weren't on good terms."

"I still love you baby father and I can't live without you." I hugged him and buried my face in his chest as he laughed at me.

He leaned down and kissed my forehead as he rubbed small circles on my back. "I'll always love you, Kemari Avani Pierson."

Y'all I wrote more chapters for book 3 than this book🤦🏽‍♀️

If I write a BWWM book, would y'all read?

Please vote❤️