Divergent; The Rarest Flower

Chapter Two... The Test Begins

     The tests begin after lunch, of which I couldn't bring myself to eat much. We sit at the long tables in the cafeteria and the test administrators call ten names at a time, one for each testing room. I sit next to Lily and across from Ash. A couple other Amity sit with us chatting easily about what's to come after the tests. How they could discuss what games to play or join in on after the tests were done confused me. Was this also how I was supposed to be thinking ?

     The test administrators are mostly Abnegation volunteers, although there is an Erudite in one of the testing rooms, an Amity in a different room and a Dauntless in another to test those from Abnegation, because the rules state that we can't be tested by someone from our own faction. The rules also say that we can't prepare for the test in any way, so I don't know what to expect.

     My gaze drifts from Ash to the Dauntless tables across the room. They are laughing and shouting and playing cards. They are easily the loudest in the room from all their laughing alone. At another set of tables, the Erudite chatter over books and newspapers, in constant pursuit of knowledge. I couldn't help but think that they should also learn tact and kindness to fit all that knowledge.

     A group of Amity girls in yellow and red sit in a circle on the cafeteria floor, playing a hand-slapping game involving a rhyming song. Every few minutes I hear a chorus of laughter from them as someone is eliminated and has to sit in the center of the circle. Lily kept glancing at me as though she wished to join them, but I was too nervous. I couldn't lose myself in a game. I didn't want to play and act like this test meant nothing. This test meant everything. At the table next to us, Candor boys make wide gestures with their hands. They appear to be arguing about something, but it must not be serious, because some of them are still smiling. You never know with Candor though, the most sly truth tellers you'll ever meet.

     At the Abnegation table, they sit quietly and wait. I can imagine that even they wish they could talk amongst themselves to distract from the nerves. However faction customs and behaviours rule over any personal desires. I doubt all the Erudite want to study all the time, or that every Candor enjoys a lively debate, but they can't defy the norms of their factions any more than I can. So here I sit, smiling and pretending I'm listening to the others with us all while I play with the bangs in front of my eyes. I let out the odd giggle as someone says something funny but my leg bounces under the table, showing my stress.

     Lily's name is called in the next group. She moves confidently toward the exit. I don't need to wish her luck or assure her that she shouldn't be nervous. The bouncing of her steps assures me she knows where she belongs, and as far as I know, she always has. My earliest memory of her is from when we were five years old. She had bounded up to me with no hesitation as I stood awkwardly and she dragged me through the orchards until I was a giggling mess with her. Only after we sang songs and danced until we were dizzy did she finally give me her name. Lily Silver.

     My stomach wrenches, maybe I'll be sick, I force my eyes closed. Wouldn't that be great, I'll vomit and won't even be able to take the test. I feel a hand at my back and I lean into it. I keep my eyes closed until ten minutes later, when Lily sits down again.

     She seems confused, her face scrunched up in thought. I open my mouth to ask her, only to snap it shut. We couldn't ask what the results were. I'm sure she was just confused by the test, not her results. She's Amity after all. I offer her a smile and she grins back her energy immediately changing.

     An Abnegation volunteer speaks the next round of names. Two from Dauntless, two from Erudite, two Abnegation, two from Candor, and then: "From Amity: Camellia Evans and Asher Ellis."

     I get up because I'm supposed to, but if it were up to me, I would stay in my seat for the rest of time. I feel like there is a bubble in my chest that expands more by the second, threatening to break me apart from the inside. I follow Ash to the exit, him flashing a grin back at me the whole time. Was he trying to make me feel better? It wasn't working