Sonadow-Part 1: The Start

20 Feeling like crap

Sonic

Tuesday, November 15, 10:52a.m.

Everyday, for the past month (and a week), I have been avoiding Shadow in any possible way I can. Though I do miss him some times, the memory of Tails's voice plays back in the back of my head. I'm more focused with my work now. We were told to write another essay. Ugh, how annoying. I started it yesterday and spent three-ish hours on it. I am editing it to be flawless. It's about Shakespeare. Yeah, and I would rather learn about it first. "Hello, you gaylord. Feeling okay?" Devin lays down beside me. "I'm good. You?" I respond. He nods, rolling onto his back. He's always checking on me if I look off or even when he hasn't.  Devin has been kind of useful ever since I broke-up with Shadow. And I say 'kind of'... he's making masterbait me every day. One day, I'll see how that beneficial. 

'KNOCK, KNOCK!'

"Who is it?" I sigh. "Hi hunny." Rouge? I turn around. "Oh, hey," I say, sitting up. She walks over to my bed and seats herself next to me. "I wanted to see you because you and Shadow seem--" I stop her. "Please, don't... just don't." I place my face into my hands and grit my teeth. "Sorry hun, it's only that I've never seen you this down before," she observes. So much for everything going back to the way things used to be. 'There's not enough things going on in my life, go away,' I think to myself. As if she had heard me, she strokes my quills. "I'm going to check on Knuckles. See you later sweetie." And with that, she left. Like Shadow. 

My mind re-lives the last time I properly spoke to him...

"Is it true?" 

"What's true? Hey, hey, hey, it's okay; it's alright!"  

"IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE GONNA DO TO ME?! Well?!"  

"Erm, umm..." 

"OH, SO YOU ARE?!" 

"Uh, no! I, umm... uh--" 

"DON'T TRY AND COME UP WITH A LAME ASS EXCUSE!" 

"Listen, whoever told you is lying--" 

"SHUT UP! SHUT UP! Shut up..."  

"Oh! So you're going to believe some bullshit lie over me?" 

"Maybe I wouldn't have if Tails wasn't the one who had told me!... I-I should have... I should have known." 

"Known what?" 

"That you are still your crappy, old self!" 

"In what way am I still my 'crappy, old self?'" "I haven't been mean to you at all! Unless the first time we met again..." 

"Oh FUCK off, you bastard! You barely do anything in this relationship anyway! I have do every single thing for you!"

"Yeah, only 'cause you offered!"

"I did sometimes but I expected you to help as well!"

"Hey! Give me some credit! I've always tried to keep you calm, help, support you; even love you!" 

"I can't fucking DO THIS ANYMORE! Don't fucking talk to me, touch me, or even look at me."

"Fine!"

"Fine..."

The voices ring inside my head. My eyes begin to sting as I start to cry. I hate this... feeling. Some days, I forget what happened until I see his face. Whether it be in real life or in my brain, it makes me feel like shit.  Anyway, let's get back on track. I'm going to carry on with my essay and nothing can stop me. I'm so close.