Amedevil Backstory

The Rules

This chapter contains violence, implied death, and implied animal mistreatment. Read at your own risk. 

Amethyst: So, where exactly are we going?

Daredevil: That's a good question. I have no idea.

Amethyst: What? You just dragged me away on a... play date and you have no idea where we're going?

Daredevil: Nope. Because that is Troublemaker Rule #2: Never have a plan. 

Amethyst: You go through your life never using doors and never coming up with a plan?

Daredevil:  Yeah! Sounds fun, right?

Amethyst: Huh... It actually kind of does. 

Amethyst: What's Troublemaker Rule #3?

Daredevil: Law is meaningless.

Amethyst: What? That doesn't make any sense!

Daredevil: Exactly. Troublemaker Rule #4: Logic Doesn't Exist, and Neither Does Consistency. 

Amethyst: So, question nothing?

Daredevil: Now you're getting it! Chips?

Amethyst: How did you even carry those while we're running?

Daredevil: SHHHH! Rule #4, remember?

Amethyst: Right. *takes chips* 

Amethyst: *GASP*

*Amethyst suddenly slides to a halt* 

Daredevil: What? What is it?

Amethyst: Look.

*In front of them a trio of ShadowWings are pulling a cart. On top of the cart are caged animals. They do not seem happy, chewing on the bars and snapping at their captors.*

Guard #1: Quiet in there! *He glares at the animals and they fall silent*

Daredevil: What's wrong? You seem sad.

Amethyst: I know these guys. They are always mean to the animals around here! 

Daredevil: Sheesh! What a bunch of jerks!

*Both of them fall silent for a moment. Amethyst gazes sadly at the ground. Then, she looks at Daredevil and realizes that the young ShadowWing is smiling*

Daredevil: >:D

Amethyst: *narrows eyes* What are you thinking?

Daredevil: I'm thinking now is a good time for some justice and violence in the name of mother nature! *pulls out a working chainsaw*

Amethyst: What? You can't kill them! 

Daredevil: Oh, don't worry. I'm not going to hurt the animals.

Amethyst: Oh phew!

Daredevil: I'm gonna murder the dragons instead!

Amethyst: Daredevil!

Daredevil: Rule #5: Murder is sometimes justified. 

Amethyst: I'm starting thing that your alignment is chaotic.

Daredevil: That thought is only hitting you now?

Amethyst: Listen, beating up these guys once isn't going to change anything.

Daredevil: I know. That's why we kill 'em instead.

Amethyst: We should just let it go!

Daredevil: Rule #6: Never let it go.

Daredevil: ...

Daredevil: LETT IT GOOOOO! LETT IT GOOO! CAN'T HOLD IT BACK ANYMORE!

Amethyst: ReaLLY? 

Guard #2: Do you guys hear singing?

Guard #3: I'm sure it's nothing. Now, come on. 

Amethyst: *growls* Why must they be so mean?

Daredevil: *holds up chainsaw*

Amethyst: *stern* No!

Guard #1: Yeah! Hurry up! I wanna sacrifice the kittens first!

Amethyst: ...

Amethyst: *grabs knife* Let's go.

Daredevil: I knew you had it in you!

*The two dragonets approach the evil dragons, holding the very dangerous weapons*

Amethyst: Okay, if we're going to do this, we need a solid plan. I'm thinking that we knock down a tree to create a barrier in the road and-

Daredevil: Rule #7: PLANS ARE DUMB!

*Daredevil jumped into the open and threw an ax at the evil dragons*

Daredevil: TAKE THIS SUCKA!

Amethyst: Are you just making these rules up as you go?

Daredevil: I'M MAKING EVERYTHING UP AS I GO!

Guards: WTF?!

Daredevil: *pulls out an entire arsenal of weapons*

Guards: Where did you even get that? 

Amethyst: *gulp*

Amethyst: Okay, I can do this.

*While Daredevil caused a distraction (mostly using explosions) Amethyst snuck over and unlocked the cages. The animals ran towards the forest, happy to be free. Amethyst directed the cats and dogs towards the town*

Amethyst: I did it! 

Amethyst: Daredevil, I did it!

Daredevil: Great job, Sweetheart!

Amethyst: Thanks! Wait....what did you just call me?

Daredevil: Nothing! Now watch me blow up these evil dragons on the spot!

Amethyst: WAIT DON'T-

--------

Amethyst: ...

Daredevil: ...

Amethyst: So, we agree to never mention the bodies?

Daredevil: Oh, definitely.