❝ i said i love you, you say nothing back. ❞ in which kang serin and lee bada were their once in a lifetime, until mistakes are made, hearts are broken and they were never supposed to meet again. until they do. ❝ we're a shot in the darkest dark. ❞
...
❝ i used to think one day we'd tell the story of us how we met and the sparks flew instantly and people would say "they're the lucky ones" ❞ — the story of us, taylor swift
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As Serin mindlessly wandered through every page of her notebook, she couldn't help but feel the frustration building up as time passed by. If there was something an artist hated more than anything in the world, it was a creative break. Literally. Serin was so sensitive to her art that she could feel whenever her creativity seemed to be broken, which was an annoyance to the extreme — her mind was constantly thinking and rethinking and overthinking, noticing patterns and metaphors other people couldn't see.
That was what made her the best.
If there was someone who could be labeled a songwriting machine, that person would be Serin. Her friends had countless of times tested how long would take for her to take a few keywords, previously chosen by them with no chance of her even imagining what they'd choose, and come up with a song concept, the lyrics and the structure. Her record was ten minutes and it happened three years ago, when she felt herself in the epitome of her creativity — no wonder it took her a month, give it or take, to have her EP done (with a few extra songs her friends still couldn't believe she kept hidden instead of making it a full album), or better: no wonder Taylor Swift wanted to collaborate with her.
But that was a long time ago — maybe not that long, but it's been a while since she had that much of a creativity bloom. And now Serin was going through what she knew would be one of the worst moments in her career: she couldn't come up with a single lyrics. A few words here and there, only a couple of full-written verses, yet she couldn't finish any of them. It didn't help that she was the main producer and songwriter on her best friends' group comeback album. How the hell would she finish a thirty-minute album in three weeks if she had already spend the last two with nothing more than rough drafts that didn't seem to get her anywhere?
It was probably the stress of it, her other best friend (the ever-wise Jiho) would say. And yes, she couldn't be more right. She would also say Serin had to talk to someone about it, vent and rant and stress more, and maybe punch a few pillows or even to go the boxing academy next to her place, but that was where Jiho couldn't be more wrong. Serin couldn't talk about it, because what was really stressing her was not the album or the pressure of creating what the media expected to be VIXEN's greatest comeback.
It was a show.
The reason behind her bitten nails, the bags under her eyes and her sleepless nights was a TV show, a MNET show. Her ex-girlfriend's show. Some would argue it was not hers, she was simply a participant in it, but Serin already knew by how social media and netizens seemed crazy over her ex-girlfriend that it was her show and she would inevitably win.
Good for her, she guessed, but terrible for Serin — she wasn't worried about her winning, she couldn't care less (was what she told herself, because there was no way in hell she would reckon any of the feelings telling her otherwise — although she had forgiven her ex-girlfriend a long time ago, it didn't mean Serin was any happier knowing her feelings still existed somewhere inside her). The issue was: Serin was supposed to participate. As a special guest, but still.
