❝ i said i love you, you say nothing back. ❞ in which kang serin and lee bada were their once in a lifetime, until mistakes are made, hearts are broken and they were never supposed to meet again. until they do. ❝ we're a shot in the darkest dark. ❞
...
❝ you think i'm gonna hate you now 'cause you still don't know what i never said ❞ — i wish you would, taylor swift
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Serin moved the tip of her finger around the glass, her mind a million times away from the present setting. It was weird the way she felt empty after such the burst of emotions she experienced the day before, but she knew at some point everything would come back and she'd have to deal with it even if she tried her best to ignore it.
She did everything she could to delay this moment — had a sleepover with everyone and purposefully stayed at grandma's kitchen until late at night, dyed her hair blonde so she could keep Yejun talking for hours and even had an impromptu photoshoot with Taeyang to keep her friend entertained, but she knew there was no escaping from Harin and Jiho.
"Serin-ah", her older friend called her and Serin raised her head to see Jiho's worrying looks at her as if she was trying to see what was going through Serin's mind. "You wanna talk?"
"Not really", Serin's honest response made her friends chuckle and she gave them a small smile, feeling her heart start racing, but she kept her hand steady as she continued to move her finger around the top of the glass.
"You shouldn't keep it all inside", Harin got up from where she was across the small table on the middle of Serin's living room to sit by Serin's side and rest her face on her shoulder. Serin sighed as she moved her free hand to pet her younger friend's hair. "We're here for you."
"I know", she muttered.
"Look, let's start with yesterday", Jiho's voice made Serin look at her again, seeing her friend leaning against the couch while keeping her eyes attentive in Serin's. "What happened?"
"It's— There's a lot", Serin chose her answer carefully, not because of her friends, but because of herself. Even though she teared up the day before, she didn't cry at all as she waited for Yejun to arrive and get her, and since then she just pretended nothing happened.
"Okay. What triggered you then?", Serin assumed Jiho was choosing what she thought as the easy path, but this time Serin's issues came a long time ago. It was not the same thing as when she told them about her insecurities, and Serin realized she was never this vulnerable with them.
Serin took a deep breath as she look at the ground while thinking where to start. She knew exactly what was the starting point, but she still didn't feel like telling them everything. She wanted to keep it short. Serin knew she should talk to them about it, and she would, but there were some things she wanted to keep to herself — not out of shame or fear, but some stuff were meant to be hidden inside her, or in a song.
"You can't tell Yejun yet. I'm gonna talk to them, but I know they won't understand now", Serin started as she avoided looking at her friends, but she felt Harin humming and she knew Jiho was nodding. "It's not a big deal, but they'll make it—"
