𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖 𝐄𝐋𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓 → jjk x m! reader

03. | round and round.

CHAPTER THREE;
blending in
chapter title taken from the song by: ratt

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Nightmares were always a frequent thing to [Y/n], and that fact remains the same, even until now.

His eyes are fixed on the white tiles of the bathroom floor once he finishes vomiting the contents of yesterday's dinner. The taste of bile is strong in his throat, and he shivers as a shudder runs through his body, the chilly air making things even worse.

He lays there, sitting down on the floor, head hanging low as he breathes for air, to be stable, to be calm.

His head still hurts. It throbs.

Flickers of red assault every corner of his vision. There are visible, crimson cracks on the floor, they're on the ceiling too, on practically every item in this entire space.

The world feels darker. The air seems to still, waiting. Scribbled red lines are painted on everything, spelling the death of all existence.

He blinks.

And then they're gone.

Everything is back the way it should be.

Everything is back to normal.

His eyes are still throbbing, as though each eyeball is on the edge of splitting into two. He heaves for breath, and then slowly pushes himself upright, carefully dragging himself to the sink.

Bloodshot [e/c] eyes are staring back at him from the mirror, and he sighs as he splashes cold water onto his face. His reflection has seen better days, that's for sure–because right now he looks just as ugly as a bulldog who licked off peanut butter from a cactus.

Oh, his looks have definitely seen much better days indeed.

Drying his face off with a towel, he quickly exits the bathroom, back to his usual stride as he carelessly plops himself back onto the bed.

He flickers his eyes to the bedside. The clock there says it's currently 3 in the morning. He groans.

"Well," he says, particularly to no one. "Guess I won't be focusing on class again. Today." Not an unusual thing, really.

However, Yaga-sensei probably isn't going to hold back on yelling at him, and added to the fiasco would probably be Haibara, who will laugh and cheer him on with his overwhelming positivity, and Nanami, who will no doubt flicker a glare towards him but say nothing else.

"Ah, who cares about that?" [Y/n] sighs and turns around to his side.

His dreams, no, his nightmares of fragmented memories are more of importance. That should be what he's focusing on, but it's hard when he wants to do nothing more than forget about it all.

If he is given the chance to change something he would try, but he doubts there will be much success. But that doesn't matter anyway.

[Y/n] is stuck in the present, with no way to change the past, no way to overwrite what his family did to him.

And perhaps, because of that, he will never know peace until the day he dies.

...If he can, that is.

━

Yaga-sensei's booming voice can definitely be heard even outside of class, [Y/n] thinks as he proceeds to be yelled at for not listening in class━he barely listens, to be honest.

After all, he just woke up. The imprint of his arm on the lower half of his face is still visible too as he blinks at each of Yaga's words.

A cold breeze blows from outside through the open window, and [Y/n] tries his best to not fall asleep right then and there. Again.