𝑾𝑰𝑪𝑲𝑬𝑫 𝑮𝑨𝑴𝑬𝑺

BIRDS PT 1.

Sept 21.Thursday, 8pm.

Rolling up to the club, shoulder to shoulder we all flood through the back doors Mitch let us into. I was mellow and chill as I had pre-gamed, and had been doing a bit of blow Krystal gave me the other night. I couldn't handle my nerves being on edge from all this anxiety. Even though I had no worries and already performed at this club before, something about being on stage scared me shitless.

I grabbed my microphone and went on stage to a small but roaring room. I saw unfamiliar faces, ones from around my block, from times before, and faces that shook me to the core. Last time I only performed House of Balloons, but the fans wanted something new, a longer set. I tend to sweep over Thursday, but It was long requested.

[ *Gunshots sound* ]
"Woah,
With a nigga like me
With a nigga like me
She said please, mercy me
Mercy me
Let me fall out of love
Before you fuck her
Before you fuck her
She begged me..."

Waves of guilt washed over me. I caught the chills several times pouring everything out through these lyrics. I hated to think about what I've done. It isn't my proudest moment, but they don't know me, nobody knows why I did it, and they'll never know. Montreal is my new starting point, once I bury this shit behind me I'll be fine.

After my set I went backstage with my comedown oncoming and my stomach flipping. I let my crew know where I was headed and met Lai'Yomae over at the bar. She giggled from the rim of her cup as the flustered bartender parted from her area. I know we ain't had nothing going on, but I didn't like that. "What's up," I said over the music, hoppin' upon the barstool.

"Abel," She smiled with her low eyes. I loved the way my name sounds coming out of her mouth. "Your set, I really liked it. Wicked Games is my new favorite." She took the last sip of her drink before flagging the bartender down again.

My heart jumped when she named my song. I tried to remain calm searching for an answer, desperately trying not to seem like a tryhard or worse, a loser. "What was the other one?"

"The Morning." She glanced over at me before speaking to the bartender. When she wasn't staring at me, her deep gray eyes watching mine, the room felt colder. "Want something?" She turned to me, but quickly turned away. "Matter of fact he'll have the same thing, put it on my tab."

She knew The Morning, I haven't performed that song publicly yet. She's been a fan. My attention quickly left that subject when she told him to put the drink on her tab. Did she think I was broke?

Our drinks slid across the counter and we began to talk over Cognac on rocks. One of her smooth legs tossed over the other as she leaned into the conversation. The closer she got, the more my heart got to jumping. Strobing red lights was the last thing I saw before we were both leaning in.

A familiar voice of screams that intertwined with the music pulled me back, having my eyes shoot open. It was Evelyn. Lai'Yomae and I both turned in that direction. Luckily she was just barely squeezing through the sweaty bodies before she could see us.

"Abel!" She approached me.

Lai'Yomae had already turned away from me, so I took that as a cue to just handle my business. Hopping off the barstool I took Evelyn by the arm and walked throughout the club with her.

"Evelyn. Hey baby... let's talk outside." I said into her ear, but she was still rambling loudly as if we had been in a full blown argument. "Why- matter of fact how did you even get way over here?"

"That doesn't matter. Why haven't you called me?!" She pushed my hand away from her. Her make-up was smeared like she had been crying. She didn't even let me get another word out before she began shoving another question down my throat. "Where's my sister? Mh?" I took a shove to the chest, "what did you do to her?"

"Nothing, chill out." I had no Idea what to tell her. With every movement her half necklace that went with her sister's dangled. I felt bad for lying, but she wouldn't understand.

"Where is she? Tell me now. She is missing! her parents haven't seen her, neither have her roommates. Don't lie to me," her voice quivered as tears built up in her eyes. I know her and her sister are very different, but I was never sure as to why she never said my or our when referring to their parents.

"I dropped her off at the airport and after I left her at the front I don't know what else happened from there." I picked up her cold hands before she could wipe her own tears. The whites of her eyes flushed red as more tears trickled down and irritation began to show. "Don't be crazy, you know I love you. I'd never go against you."

"You're right. I'm sorry. I'm worried about you. Worried you'll leave me for someone better... like that girl you were talking to." More tears began to spill. "Who is that?" she choked out before she was full on bawling.

"Nobody. You know in the end we're all we need." I pull her in tight for a hug. I didn't let it linger for too long as I didn't really care that much. I just wanted to keep her off my back a little longer. Afterwards I walked her to her car, my guilt kept my nerves on edge. Opening the door for her she got in with hesitance. I could tell she was happy to see me and well.. I was sorta happy to see her. I just can't enjoy this how I want to. My guilt is gnawing on my insides. As she pulled off a gust of cold air tossed me back into harsh reality.

My crew came flooding from the sides of the building where we entered and they didn't look too chill. "We gotta head out and back to the crib now." Toni grabbed my arm guiding me back to the car. I completely let everything slip and forgot about Lai'Yomae, But she probably doesn't care considering she turned away from me so quickly. I wouldn't blame her.

Everybody stuffed themselves inside of the car without wasting a second. "The gang was looking for you," Toni's voice overpowered the hum of the engine. "And so was Lisa's boyfriend. They all had guns, shit wasn't looking too good."

I sat quietly as he jerked the vehicle out of the parking lot. What the fuck am I going to do.