Fixing the Broken

The Three Musketeers and Hospitals

"God changes caterpillars into butterflies, sand into pearls, and coal into diamond rising time and pressure. He's working on you, too."

As time went on Melinda and Samson became inseparable. Samson began coming to the Newman Center for Daily Masses. Father Kurt would constantly make jokes, we were suddenly known by everyone as the three musketeers. Suddenly we spent every day and night that we weren't at work, school, or church together. Every night was either movie or game night, if we could not get together in person we spent hours in a group Facetime. We would pray the rosary and show each other songs. Sometimes we would stay up till the early hours of the next morning watching Psych while drinking schnapps it was the best summer I have had in many years since getting sick. We went to concerts and parties. Till we hit a blip in our plans. Samson had developed feelings for Melanie. I knew it was happening, he started letting Melanie give him hugs. I was the one who pointed out how uncomfortable he was with physical touch. I came up with the idea of a high five to say goodbye but suddenly physical touch was okay if it was with Melanie. My heart was crushed I had tried so hard to get his attention. He seems so genuine, so smiley, he was a god-loving but also a god-fearing man and those are hard to find. Finally, Samson came forward and told Melanie that he had feelings for her. Sadly Melanie did not listen to Hamilton and she threw away her shot and turned him down at the church. But Samson sought me out for comfort after his talk with Melanie. After this encounter between Samson and Melanie the three musketeers turned into Lydia and Samson------Lydia and Melanie. We still did things together but the nightly calls and movies ended. At this time my health began to play an incredibly dangerous game and sadly I had to play without choice. 

             Here is  a diary of what happened

July 14th

Today my mother who is my caregiver and I  ended up in the hospital because my Port-a-Cathe had a scab when there was no injury for it to scar over. The nurses seemed more scared than I was when I showed them my chest. I had noticed it just an hour before while I was in mass. My heart stopped when I realized how deadly this could be without proper help. Me and my mom played on our phones and watched movies as I was constantly called back and then told to go to the waiting room again and again. The first call was for blood work the phlebotomist was quick and apologized for not having a room. Being in the waiting room of a hospital when you don't have an immune system is terrifying, everyone is coughing and vomiting and it is just a mess of germs. Me and my mother looked like weirdos fully masked up in lazy clothes. The next person to call my name was the nurse, when he got a look at my Port he told me he was not going to touch me without the doctor present. At this point, I felt like I couldn't breathe no one would tell me what was happening. The doctor came over and he and the nurse decided my port needed to be accessed. As I cried silently in pain my mother held my hand. They kept the needle in while they decided if they were going to admit me but in the end, they decided it wasn't severe and sent me home. 

July 16th

The scab had fallen off but now there was just like a little opening where there was nothing in the middle but a really hard ridge around it in a perfect circle. At this point, Samson is losing his mind because the test results to tell if there is a blood infection are still pending. His exact words were "Do they realize they are playing with your life? This is actual life or death." He checked multiple times a day to see if the results had arrived.

July 24th

Today I received my test results. There was no infection at all blood or skin. I went to my doctor and he did blood work again but still no infection. He sent in referrals for its removal because it has begun to turn black and the hole in the skin is growing each day. Samson and Melanie are scared right now and although I am terrified I need to be strong for all of my loved ones. If they know I'm scared it will get scarier for them. Samson refuses to look at it but Melanie wants to see it any chance she gets.

July 28th

Today Melanie, Samson, and I all went to see the Barbie movie. We convinced Samson to dress as Ken if I bought him the outfit and me and Melanie just went full-out pink. We met up with a couple of other friends at the theatre who took me seriously as they should when I told them if they were going to come they had to dress as Ken. I was proud of all of them they were definitely Kenough. It was nice to forget I was sick and 2 seconds from an ER trip for a couple of hours. We had fun and played games and Melanie flirted and I bonded and befriended the guys. I wish I could have frozen time.

July 31st

I have been fighting with the hospital over getting my surgery scheduled. For the last week, they have been putting off scheduling my surgery to the point I went to my doctor today and he sent referrals to every doctor that can perform the surgery within 50 Miles. Samson and Fr Kurt are losing their mind because they fear my death. Fr Kurt did an anointing of the sick today to prepare me for surgery. He had Samson join us for all the prayers. Melanie was crazy overprotective no one was allowed to get close to me except Fr and Samson.

Aug 3rd

I was called by a new hospital as I helped my younger sister pack for college. By 9 AM the Port that was surgically placed in my chest under my skin was revealed and surrounded by dead black skin. Samson was still checking in on me multiple times a day. Samson was pushing me to go to the ER without even looking at it. I am in constant excruciating pain, I haven't slept or eaten much because I can't move with the pain and if I try then I get Nauseous. When the new hospital called me to schedule I explained what was happening and the lovely scheduler told me to get to the hospital as fast as humanly possible because she was going to personally call the surgeon to let him know I have to have surgery today. Samson and Melanie were ecstatic when I told them I was being rushed to the hospital. When I arrived I had no wait the nurse met me at check-in and put me in a room. Once they had me gowned up I felt like I was a circus Act. I had Nurse after Nurse come in to look at my chest. They had never seen anything like it happen before. I am the first recorded case of my port killing all the skin off and practically falling out. Nurse after Nurse told me how amazing it was that I wasn't septic and fighting for my life in the ICU. They did more bloodwork and found that I still didn't have an infection. This just baffled the nurses who sent more in to look. The surgeon personally came to see it for himself instead of his assistant. He sat down and begged me not to get another Port placed because although this one didn't kill me even though it should have, there was no way to stop a new port from killing me. I agreed and he took me to surgery at that moment. When I came too it was 3 hours later, it wasn't because they had put me under but once they had taken it out my pain was gone and I fell asleep. The Nurses felt bad for me so they decided to let me take a 2 hour nap because I needed it. When I woke up I had to make a turkey sandwich to prove I was okay to go home. My mother was driving my sister back to school so my dad could be with me and he was sending them pictures of me sleeping and making my sandwich. Melanie's mother had called my mother repeatedly for updates on me and told her it was ridiculous that she had left with her other daughter instead of staying with me. My dad put me back in my wheelchair and got me to the car and home where I fell asleep for the rest of the day with him sitting by my side to watch. 

Aug 4th

I still feel absolutely no pain from surgery. They weren't able to save enough skin so they had to leave it open. It was terrifying to know I had a hole in my chest that was packed with cotton. I feared what it looked like. My best friends are getting married tomorrow and I refuse to miss their wedding no matter what. I will force myself to be okay for tomorrow. I spent today resting and saving energy. Samson and Melanie stopped by with Ice Cream to watch movies but I ended up falling asleep. When I woke Samson was gone but Melanie was still there. We watched some Psych before she had to leave. My mother was still with my sister at college but my dad did an amazing job taking care of me. He made sure I ate at least 3 meals, and he helped me to and from the couch and the bathroom. My parents are my usual caregivers since my ex but my dad went above and beyond like he did when I was septic from strep at 18.