26 | Doubts

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Lately all that you felt was endless doubts about the League's plans, sure you loved them, but you felt like this wasn't the answer. There has to be another way, you knew first hand how some heros weren't truly good people, some were blinded by the prestige, by the ranking system, they want to be the best. Others only do it because their family pressured them into it, some lost the whole meaning of being a hero, doing it to simply continue a family tradition.

What does it mean to be a hero nowadays? People can just study in the hero course for a few years, graduate and they get to call themselves heros. Being a hero became a sought after career path.

Who gets to pass judgement on to others and judge whether they're heros or villains. Everyone in the League has their reasons. Heros failed them. The hero society as a whole has failed multiple people and this led them to choose to become a villain, this was their way of fighting back.

Your commitment to dismantling the hero society wavered as you grappled with the moral toll of causing harm to innocent lives. Struggling with the conflict between shared goals and personal ethics, you sought a way to align your convictions with the League's mission.

During the meetings and strategic discussions, you observed the passion of your comrades, their determination to tear down a system they perceived as corrupt. However, the more you delved into their plans, the more discomfort settled in your gut. The League's methods, often involving collateral damage and endangering civilians, contradicted your aversion to causing harm.

One day, as the League outlined a particularly aggressive operation, you couldn't contain your unease any longer. "I joined because I want change, but I can't be a part of hurting innocent people," you asserted, your voice echoed in the room, everyone looks at you, taking in what you just said.

Shigaraki regarded you with a mix of irritation and curiosity. "This is the only way to bring them down. Sacrifices have to be made."

You weren't convinced, despite being labeled a traitor and a villain, your morals remain unchanged. You didn't want to cause harm. All you wanted was the destruction of the hero society. You wanted corrupt heros to atone for their sins. You wanted villains to be rehabilitated not shunned and cast aside.

The members were a part of your family now, and you couldn't abandon them, not after all they've done for you. Because Shigaraki's initiative you graduated early thanks to online school he paid for. You were working under the doctor, you get to learn something new everyday. No one in your old life has done so much for you, has listened to what you actually wanted.

Everyone in the league was supportive of you, they liked hearing what you had to say, they had no reason to use you. They always made you feel at home. Even After the backlash you faced since the leak of those pictures, they were there to support you. Your parents on the other hand disowned you, believing the tabloids rather than trying to figure out the truth.

Yes, you were with Dabi, yes, you loved a villain, but that doesn't mean you leaked information, that you were involved with the League. It seemed like everyone was waiting for a reason to hate you.

It's only when everyone turned on you that you decided to join. The way people treat villains or anyone that had ties with them was horrible. That day, you realized who were your true friends. Your actual family.

You didn't have to go to any mission today so you studied for a bit then you worked out, you binge purged a few times, you felt like a failure because despite trying your hardest to stop you couldn't, the temptation was so strong. Despite having loyal friends and a loving boyfriend, the urge of binge purging couldn't go away. It's like having a big monster looming over you at all times, haunting your every thought.

You were healing Twice after he came back from the mission. You touched his wound to regenerate the damaged tissues. He told you about the mission he went on, and he thanks you for healing him, you have grown to love Jin, he was such a lovable guy, always there when you needed him, he was honorable and always there for all his friends.

Toga approached the both of you. Sitting right next to you on the couch. She greets Twice then she looks at you

"I thought about what you said earlier today and I get it. It's not easy," She admitted, sharing her own internal struggles.

"I often thought about the damage we might cause innocent people, people that weren't involved in making this society that shuns us."

When you entered your shared room, you found Dabi brooding over a map detailing the aftermath of the League's latest mission. You hesitated before approaching him. You looked like you had a lot on your mind.

"What's eating at you?" Dabi asked, his voice a low murmur.

You sighed, the words caught in your throat as doubt and conflict wrestled within you. "Dabi, I can't shake this feeling. I know we're here for change, but the damage we cause... it's tearing at me."

He studied your face, his piercing gaze searching for the turmoil you couldn't conceal. "We're not in this for rainbows and sunshine, you know that," he retorted.

"I get it, but I joined to change the system, not to leave destruction in our wake," you confessed, the weight of your convictions pressing against your chest. "I feel like I have blood on my hands, even if I haven't killed anyone myself."

Dabi's eyes softened, a rare vulnerability surfacing. "This life comes with consequences. We're not playing heroes."

"But what's the point of tearing down a corrupt system if we become just as ruthless as the ones we want to bring down?" you questioned, your frustration seeping into the words.

In that moment, the room felt smaller, the silence that followed was deafening.

He reached out, and caresses your cheek. "Change ain't pretty. It's messy, and yeah, it might stain your hands. But we're doing something, not just sitting around waiting for a hero to save the day."

His piecing blue eyes looking at the depths of your soul. As you leaned into Dabi's touch, a silent understanding passed between you. The path you'd chosen was fraught with moral ambiguity. But in each other's presence all your doubts disintegrate into nothingness. You wanted a new world with Dabi. A world where what happened to him wouldn't happen again. A world where monsters like Endeavor would be punished instead of rewarded.

After Dabi shared what he went through with his father, you couldn't help but see heros in a different light, how many of these so called heros acted that way behind closed doors. Enji Todoroki can't be the only one.

Heros have the best public persona anyone could dream of, this protects them when they cause harm to others. If they harm a villain without a reason, they can just say they had to, if they are abusive with their partner and children it gets hidden and buried because, they are heros, how can a hero do something like that?

After getting ready for bed you lay down next to dabi. His smell was intoxicating, his presence was comforting. You face each other. He looks so beautiful like this, peaceful almost. He pulls you close to him, his warm embrace was everything you ever wished for.

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