The Posthumous of Serena Garbow

Chapter 3 Serena

The bright light from outside blinded my eyes. I was trying to push the chairs out from underneath me when I heard, "Are you okay," Rose, Max's sister, whispered. She was kneeling in front of me.

"Yes," I looked up from the scattered pile of chairs and saw Anndra, my best friend and our resident tightrope walker, and Rose looking down at me.

"What happened here?" Anndra asked.

"She met Max," Rose gave me a hand to help me up from the floor.

"Were you so overtaken by his yumminess that you fell over?" Anndra said sarcastically and chuckled. Rose rolled her eyes.

"Don't be ridiculous. He apologized and then left," I corrected her.

Anndra quickly changed the topic as she seemed to know I was uncomfortable, "Well, I am about to show my act to Caz. You should come watch."

Anndra's family, the Kappas, had been with our circus for three generations. Her wire act was my favorite, and watching Anndra always gave me goosebumps. It's amazing how it wobbled below her feet, but she was still able to glide on it like an ice skater. Her slippers gripped the trembling cable to calm it with her touch. I wished I could perform her act. And to have so much control over something. But the only way to become part of an act is to be married into that family, at least in our family circus. Before Dad passed, he wanted me to ride the trick horses and what that really translated to him was that he wanted the Johovic's and my family to join forces. As in getting married. It may seem like an old idea, arranged marriages, but from my dad, there was no other way. Dad knew that I wanted to follow in his footsteps and become a ringmistress. When I was young he allowed me to think this might actually happen. But the year Covid arrived was the same time he broke the news to me. That I was too old to play ringmaster and that I had to start taking on more mature roles. His idea of maturity for a woman was to get married. Now, Alix, the Johovic's son, was alright and all, but I don't want to be forced into anything. That is when I began to explore the tightrope act. The tightrope act was more... stable... predictable than a horse. The rope, it was always where it should be. It didn't move around the tiny ring in dizzying circles. I hated to say this, but I envied Anndra and her talent. If only I could be just as controlled at something, as Anndra was on the wire

As I watched her perform for Caz, she became a different person up there. She seemed to mature; to become celestial. She would stand with her two feet on the rope, shoulder length apart, it was straight and taunt under her feet as she reached down to wrap her arms around it. The tightrope would press into the palms of her hands as she lifted one leg into the air. The wire wobbled under her weight, her toned arms soothed the shivering cable. Her legs were straight out behind her. She held her pose for a second waiting for it to steady and then raised one arm, while the other arm became her platform. Out her arm would stretch. All her fingers pointed toward the invisible audience. Not one line in her face, she was calm and meditative. She was in a place I wanted to be. I saw her look up at me and smile. Her hand rose out toward me as she waved me over, while she held her body up with one hand. I looked over at Caz to make sure he was not paying attention. He was too busy with his paperwork and talking to Mr. Milosovici. Caz didn't look very happy as he spoke with him; his arms waving in the air. I placed one foot forward and walked toward Anndra. She slipped down onto the ground.

"Do you still want to learn?" She ran her hand along the wire.

"I do, but you know..," I gestured toward Caz.

"Are you free tonight?"

"I am, but not until much later, and by then the tent will be closed." I paused to look up at the lights, "and dark."

"That is the best time," she grabbed my shoulders and shook. "Have you ever been in the tent after everyone goes home and the lights go down?"

"No," she made it sound so magical, "I am not even sure how I would sneak out," I whispered, afraid Caz might hear us. My brother had become very protective since Dad died.