Roomates to Lovers

Relapsed

Johnnies POV:

Staring at the ceiling,I woke up. I felt empty and alone. It's that day of the month again, I wish I could Sleep through but I can't, I promised Jake I would film with him today. What If I tell him I'm not feeling well? He would be so dissapointed tho, I hate when hes mad. I gotta get up tho.

*Time skip

It's 10:15 now, I'm on the Sofa watching TV. I feel so sad, stressed and alone. I have the urge to harm myself but I have been clean for About a Year now. I think I'm having a Panick attack, I just wanna feel something. Fuck it I can't do this anymore

*goes to the bathroom

While the Tears were rolling down my face, I open the drawer at the Bottom Right and see it, then Things that kept me alive when I was at my worst. My Blades.

I don't care About anything anymore, i don't care that I had been clean for a year, i just wanna feel something. When the Blood started dripping on the Floor I realised what I had done. "No No No, please No, I didn't just do that" I cried out loud. I'm so stupid why did I do that. Suddenly I hear knocking " Johnnie are you Okay?". It was Jakes voice, he can't know About this, why did I do that. "Yea I'm fine, I'll be out in like 15 minutes so we can start filming" I said. "Sounds good but if you don't want to film today we don't need to." "No It's okay, I'll be there soon." "alr." I get cleaned up and head out to film with Jake.

*Time skip

After we finished filming I went to my Room because I felt really Dizzy, probably because of my blood loss. I just layed in my bed and slowly started falling asleep.

*Time skip (again)

I got woken up by a knocking at my door, it was Jake. " You doing okay, Johnnie?" he asked me with a soft and caring Voice. I sit up and just look at my Hands. I can't get any words out of my mouth. My Eyes started to get puffy and I feel the Tears rolling down my cheeks. " Hey don't cry , what happened?" he asked me While taking a seat next to me. I hadn't realised that there were blood stains on my Hoddie before so I quikly put a blanket over my wrist and hoped that he didn't see it but when I looked at him I just see a shocked Expression on his face, he defintely saw it. "Oh Johnnie... don't tell me you... relapsed." "I'm Sorry I'm Sorry I'm Sorry..." Suddenly Jake interuppts me " Don't Apologize."

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BOOM CLIFFHANGER BITCHES

sorry but my Mom is gonna take my laptop so I probably won't post chapter 2 this Week. I also have to Focus on School more but soon is winter Break so I'll have more time to write.

Hope yall like the Story so far

Sorry If It's not good English isn't my Native Language.