Truly, Madly, Deeply

Chapter 55: He's Trying

It's been a month since Tristan was abducted by Summer. He won't admit it, but he is still struggling. He has had a few nightmares.

She is being held in the county jail as a flight risk. She is facing abduction with bodily harm in the second degree, as well as attempted rape in the third degree.

Tristan was so upset when the story hit the papers. He was embarrassed by what it stated. She tried to rape him but was unable to because his body didn't function.

He and I have made love so much it's like he's trying to prove there isn't anything wrong with him. He was asked about doing an interview, and he declined, but I told him maybe he should agree to the interview and state why his body didn't function.

He has woken up several nights in hot sweats. He says he's fine, but I think he is still thinking about his biggest fear, which was never seeing me or his kids again.

I'm so worried about him. I have told him he doesn't have to prove to me he doesn't have issues with his body because I know perfectly well that his package works just fine. Here lately, it's too good; I'm talking sometimes five or six times a day.

I will do anything to make him happy, and the only thing that he wants is me. I am always happy to oblige; I am just really worried about him. He hasn't worked since it happened, and he has barely left the house. 

I hate that girl so much for what she has done to our family and my husband. The fear she made him deal with and the nightmares he has now.

He's struggling, and the worst part is he won't admit it to me or himself. I have tried to get him to see a counselor he refuses.

I just want my sweet, fun, loving husband back. I want to see his eyes light up again. I want him to enjoy his kids rather than trying to hug them as much as he can, like he's dying. The joy our kids and I gave him before this happened.

I want my husband to come home from work so happy to see his family. Rather than acting like he's trying to cherish every moment like it's his last.

The few times we have left the house he is watching everyone like someone is going to take us away. The first time we left the house after the incident, he had a panic attack, and we had to leave the grocery store.

He makes Robert and Colin go shopping with me to protect me. He went to the doctor with me once since the incident, and he was sweating and breathing hard until we got back home.

He's trying to be so strong for me, but I know he is struggling. I just want him to get the help he needs so we can get back to our lives.

It's killing me to see him in this shape. He has dark circles under his eyes. He's not sleeping a full night. I feel him shake when he's having nightmares. It breaks my heart, and I will do everything I can to help him through this.

I normally wake him up and get him a cold washcloth. He will be trembling and apologize to me. I go downstairs and fix him a cup of warm milk with cinnamon. He will drink it and come back to bed, but he doesn't go back to sleep. He just lays there and holds me while I sleep.

I am pregnant, so I can't stay awake. I have been sleeping a lot with this one. I feel so tired and exhausted. I love my husband, and I just want him to get better.

The next morning, I woke up with his arms wrapped around me. I rubbed his hand, and he kissed my shoulder.

"Good morning, baby."

"Good morning, Handsome. I'm guessing you didn't go back to sleep last night."

"No, I just laid here enjoying the sounds of you sleeping away. Your breathing relaxes me, and I am at peace when I listen to you sleep."