It's me again and today was busy with work, helping people in the store, doing the cash registers, and still on my period while doing it all from 8.30 till 16.00 with an hour break at 13.00. After the hours I got tired but a friendly woman asked me to help her and I did, she was so thankful and I went back to work.
A half-hour to go and I was asked to choose a cake in the bakery of the store (I picked the strawberry one) I went to my sis who was asking for me to do the cash register and the hour 16.00 was on the way.
The hours went by, my mom was already waiting for us with our dog (buddy) and we picked everything that we needed after putting all the cash drawers upstairs where it was safe. I went to the lockers and got mine and my sister's stuff, I had also a big box with the food that I bought. I went downstairs to gather the two cakes (1 for me and 1 for my sister) and 2 baguettes that my sis got. We went to the back to close the store with all the employees that were working till closing time. I was struggling to walk with a large box because I needed to balance the things I bought and the cakes that we got plus the baguettes.
We went outside and went to the car to put the box into the trunk, I went inside the car and we waited till my sister and the other employees were gone before leaving the parking, and going home. When we arrived home, I got the box out of the car and went to the door. We went inside and I started to unpack what was in the box and after some minutes I started wondering where that second cake went. The cake was not in the car, not in the house and while I searched and searched my mom was creating theories that weren't true. I started stressing out and started to blame myself, with my period I even went to the bathroom and started crying, moving to my bed laying under the covers thinking of how much blame I had but also of the responsibility that I had too much and that I struggled with everything. I kept saying that I was ready to go off this world and that I was done with everything, my thoughts were focused on one thought that I wanted to be gone.
After some crying and talking to myself or an invisible person, called my mom for the appetizers, but I didn't listen because I was so irritated yet sad about the situation later on I just went downstairs, having a hungry feeling, and cried a little, trying to be strong. My sister stayed upstairs getting her plate with appetizers and didn't see her the whole evening because of the PS4.
The rest of the evening was very quiet and saw a series of two brothers that made some escape rooms where Belgian celebs needed to escape them in less time than the other pair
I then went to sleep and hoped that tomorrow would be again different than today.
XxxxxAmberL
YOU ARE READING
Dear Diary
Non-FictionMy safe place to put my emotions and thoughts in it. (Mostly bad emotions or thoughts because I need to have a place to get rid of the bad things) XxxxxAmberL
