ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕏𝕍: 𝕄𝕚𝕤𝕤 𝕄𝕪𝕤𝕥𝕚𝕔 𝔽𝕒𝕝𝕝𝕤
-1x19-
"My anaconda don't! My anaconda don't! My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns hon!" Lorelei sang as she danced in front of her mirror while brushing her teeth
"Oh my God, look at her butt! Oh my God, look at her butt! Oh my God look at her butt! Look at her butt! L-L-L-Look at her butt-" Lorelei sang as she was twerking in front of her mirror until she saw Damon standing there with a grin in his face. Lorelei slowly turned to face him as she cleared her throat
"Yes, Damon?" She asked in a deep voice
"I love it when you dance for me, but I feel like you need to know that you don't have an ass. Like that shit flat. You got nice tits but, um.. ass.. pancake. And I say this not to make you insecure because I love your flat ass, however to save you embarrassment in the future when you twerk, that shit don't move. It's like frozen. You just look like you're breaking your back" Damon admitted leaving Lorelei jaw dropped. She couldn't even respond as she tooth brush fell from her hand and onto the ground. Damon walked over and gave her a peck on the cheek with a grin before walking out. Lorelei was still just standing there with her mouth open like a doofus
"Call me if you need anything, pancake! I'll be at the Founder's Hall. Looks like my little brother is having issues with blood!" Damon yelled before Lorelei heard the front door shut. Lorelei finally moved and closed her mouth. She picked up her tooth brush and threw it away before she inspected her ass in the mirror
"It's not flat. It's not flat. I have a fat juicy ass" She kept telling herself hoping it would eventually come true. News flash, it didn't
"Stefano the vlud sucker is home!" Lorelei yelled in a Russian accent as she stood in the living room of the Salvatore house
"That was shit" Damon said
"Die you slut" Lorelei replied
"I'm your slut" He said as he wiggled his eyebrows
"Gross" Stefan said as he walked by
"How was school baby brother?" Damon asked
"It was fine" Stefan replied
"Yeah? Same old, same old? Nothing new? No stories to bring home?" Damon asked
"What are you getting at, Damon?" Stefan asked
"We know you're sucking vlud!" Lorelei announced still talking in a shitty Russian accent
"I'm not on human blood. I'm clean guys" Stefan tried to lie
"Bitch I smell that AB+ on your ass" Lorelei replied as she sniffed his jacket like she was a dog. Stefan pushed her head away causing her to fall backwards on her flat ass
"Fuck! That hurt" Lorelei said
"See I told you it was flat" Damon said
"I don't have a flat ass, right Stefan?" Lorelei asked turning to the younger Salvatore
"I actually gotta go so.." Stefan said trying to get out of answering
"Nah, that's wild. Both of yall die" Lorelei said
"Now we have some questions. Damon really insisted you be in this pageant so.. well.. who am I to decline such a rather.. attractive man.. anyway. This year's queen will have the honor of taking center stage.. at the 150th Founder's Day Gala. We will crown our winner but we'd like to get to know a bit more about you" Carol said
YOU ARE READING
𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘓𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘋𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦|| D. Salvatore
Fanfiction"𝙒𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙜𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙢𝙚 𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙡𝙖𝙨𝙩 𝙙𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚?" In which Lorelei Gilbert returns to Mystic Falls after 15 years for her younger brother's funeral and gets more than she bargained for TVD Fanfic Slight Crackfic Damon Salvatore x Fem!O...
