Finally understood

Part 2

Leah would not leave me alone until I told her what happened but I didn't want to. "Leah just-"
"Alex, somethings happened Katie can tell she's been on the phone to me something about a alley way and men now tell me" "Leah nothing happened" I said almost crying and my voice cracked tryna keep myself together "where are you going" she asked me as I grabbed a football and put on my boots "out." I went down to the local cages and found a empty one I just started kicking the ball around doing shots from different angles and that "I'm sorry for telling her" lauryn appeared out of no where "it's fine.. wait what did you say" I asked passing the ball to her "we got mugged took your bracelet and the man.... And you against the wall" she said before taking a shot and scoring "nothing happened so it  doesn't matter just London" "but something did happen and I just stood there" "an that's not your fault you had three men blocking you... just don't worry about it" I tried to reassure her but some girls from our school walked in "Alex lauryn?" They said "hey." Lauryn answers but I didn't say anything while kicking the ball around "so you really are Williamson sister" they joked "what" it turns around "no I'm not?" I laughed "you two got tagged in a picture on instagram with Katie McCabe an Leah Williamson" "shit" lauryn whispered "that's not me" I denied "don't act stupid Alex" "I'm not I gotta go" "me to" lauryn said as we ran off "who the fuck did you tell" lauryn asked me "nobody! You heard her yourself she checked Leah's insta" I said  but honestly the fact she had the guts to blame me? I went straight home ignoring her but when I walked in I went up to my room Leah wasn't around so I went to bed

The next day

"Up you have school!" She yelled at me "no" I rolled back over but she pulled the covers off me and opened the curtain "okayyyy" I groaned before she left and i put on my uniform. I rolled up my skirt high enough I put on my white school shirt what I tucked in I tied my black and red striped tie before putting my jumper on and I carried my blazer "let's go" she said as I got downstairs and into the car for about a ten minute drive "alright have a good day" she said as we pulled up and she was ready for her trianing "bye," I mumbled before getting out and I walked inside and automatically people where looking at me "special treatment" I heard somebody yell but people kept shoulder barging. Me all day... "you have such a perfect life why the fuck did she try kill her self" I heard somebody whisper behind me in lesson but I walked out upset from hearing that and hid in the bathroom but I could not help but cry "Alex you need to come out" I heard a teacher knock "please just leave me the fuck alone" I asked with tears streaming down my face "you know I can't do that.. please Alex-" I ended up walking out and I had about 5 teachers following me "okay call her sister" I heard one say ffs... but I couldn't stop crying  and after about 20 minutes class ended so that means people exiting classrooms so the teachers lost me but my phone kept vibrating from Leah phoning me to get to reception and soon I did and the teachers found me there about 7 of them surrounding me but they let Leah in and Leah looked at me like she knew something happened "please can we just go," I asked "miss williamson if you would like to follow us" they tried to make a meeting and they made us sit in this room "okay what exactly seems to be the problem to my make sister this upset" she said sternly and they all kept saying me disruptive and in controllable "if your just gonna fucking sit there and slag me off what's the point of this" I said "Alex" Leah said sternly "no it's funny they talk about mental health and bullying but the minute it happens they see their arses just please fucking let me go" "that's a suspension for three days" the teacher said "oh fuck you can stick this stupid school up your arse!" Leah dragged me out the room and kept a firm grip of my arm until we got to the car "what the hell are you thinking!" I didn't say a word tryna clean the mascara down my face "what happened" she asked me "people found out about you... all day people have been finding out stuff about me and in the middle of lesson somebody said her life is so perfect why the fuck did she try to kill her self Leah I swear I tried in lessons I did but I can't" I just broke down and Leah soon stopped frowning and realised how upset I am "Alex..." "no because I'm supposed to behave well fuck it Leah I'm done can we please just go home" I asked before she yelled at me "I'm sorry... I didn't know this was happening" we got home and I went straight to my room locking the door but I heard Leah yelling at the school down the phone downstairs but I soon cleaned my makeup off as it was ruined but I had some crying rashes for fuck sake but all the messages where going to my phone as my number has been leaked. All the DMS telling me to kill my self alllll over again "hey it's me" I heard Leah knock on the door and I let her in but she just sat on the floor with me "I basically just kicked off I felt like a right mum" she made me laugh as she sat next to me and she put her arm around me "what's up" she asked me  "nothing?" I smiled a bit "listen I know you haven't exactly had the best day but I was thinkinggg maybe me a you could go the cages kick a ball around?" She smiled "sorry le... just not really in the mood for it"I never thought I would say that...

Leah's pov

That's how I know it's bad her mental health again and I know she's gonna end up doing somthing " well how about we watch a movie you can pick?" I asked but she shook her head "I'm just tired Le," by the way she sounded I could tell so I let her sleep but as soon as I got out I let out a sigh so I called Jacob "hey Leah what's up what has she done now" he joked "nothing, rough day at school she's struggling again I can tell  she's just tired she doesn't wanna go play footy with me she has been crying I can tell" "let me know... if it gets worse like last time I'll be down the motorway" he joked and soon we  ended the call I sat on the sofa as it's almost 4 but she slept without eating all night

The next couple of days have been hard for her she's suspended and has lost all of her motivation completely she has only been here For a week and this has fucking happened... that school is horrible honestly but I refuse to let her go back to mum they are both as bad for each other I'm not giving up on her that easy at all so I invited Beth around as I'm lonely as she's just sat in her room "where the trouble maker" she joked sitting down with me "been in her room for days..." I said looking at her "what why?" She sat up a bit "incident happened at school she doesn't wanna be in London mum and dad both gave up on her she's just going through it and I don't know how to help her... last time she ended up in hospital Beth and it killed me to watch her go threw it" now I'm getting upset "Leah there's not much you can do for teenagers and mental health apart from be there check up on her regularly don't leave her alone until she eats" she told me "I know just whenever I ask her if she's okay or anything she just pushes me away she hasn't even been going to training for god sake an that's that is how you know something is up" I laughed a bit "how about I go speak to her," she offered "good luck with that" I smiled but she genuinely did go upstairs

Alex's pov

Somebody opened my door and it's Beth "god open some curtains" she laughed opening them "hello to you to," I sat up a bit putting my phone down and she just lay next to me "what ya doinnnn" she asked me "nothin?" I said as I know she's tryna get at somthig "listen...I want you to talk to me because your like totally emo?" She said "emo really" I laughed "what I can't use cool kid slang" she made me laugh "but on a serious not cmon talk to me orrrr  at least Leah everybody's worried about you kid you haven't been texting lauryn or anybody back" "Beth.. there's nothing to worry about" I said "you haven't been playing football your crazy about football" she joked "I'm fine beth I swear" "don't lie kid I know you ain't you just don't want the whole world knowing again" I looked at her as she just understood "fine you got me..." I said "just last time..... press found out everybody in school found out I couldn't go outside" I looked at her "and it's okay that's a valid reason just you got to speak to Leah in order for you to get better Leah would give up her career for you everything she has because that's how much you mean to her and I know your parents gave up and that's not what parents are mean to do but Leah is the next thing you have to a parent" she convinced me to talk to her and once beth left I just didn't know how to but I kinda promised beth I would so I headed downstairs and sat on the sofa opposite Leah "hey, your alive" she joked "yeah" I said quietly "you okay?" She asked me. She had her reading glasses on  and moved them to on top of her head putting her phone down "beth kinda forced me to promise to come talk to you....." I said "I get it's hard after last time" she said "I just can't go three that again Leah. If I do I don't see myself getting better" I looked at her "actually" she said sitting up "I can't, I won't make it out of it again and that's what im scared off so I'm just isolating myself it's easier " I looked at her  "how long has it been like this" she asked me "a while" I tried my best not to like cry or anything "just all been coming back to me the night.." I said and she knew what I was talking about "might help if you tell me what exactly happened on your side like what do you remeber" I looked at her before I answered "two packets of paracetamol... I took them and it hit me the sick feeling but I just lay there I remember everything I felt and I heard mum knock on the door but I was out of it she walked in seen me seen the packets and started yelling at me and shaking me but I passed out then woke up with a nurse watching me 24/7 and you on the other side you where asleep but I could tell you where upset" "I was... I got the phone call you over dosed and I got in my car and I sped so fast to the hospital I remember you seizing it was scary you know seeing the doctors injecting you with all this stuff before you woke up an I didn't think you where gonna make it honestly I know it sounds bad.. but then you did you got threw it Alex and you can do it again just don't do anything stupid" she said meaning overdose again "I'll try not to" I said with a small smile