branch angst

goodbye again

branch POV:

their back. my brothers are back. after many years of living without them, they decide to jump back into my life out of nowhere. i was still upset, but with the family back together, i shouldn't be such a downer.

their not the only things that are back, either. their constant bickering has returned. i get it, family's fight. but when it becomes an almost daily thing, it's definitely not normal. especially in the bunker we've been staying in. you can hear someone fighting from basically any place in the house! speaking of fighting, that's exactly how my day started.

"you know damn well that wasn't an accident!! it was taped to a note with my name on it!" i heard bruce yell at john dory.

bruce was staying with us temporarily after the whole incident. he was going to have to go back to his wife and kids soon, which hurt, but i guess it was necessary.

"yeah, well, maybe if you bought food for the rest of us while you were out i wouldn't have to resort to eating yours!" john dory shot back.

at that moment i walked into the room. the two of them lowered their voices as if it would stop me from hearing them. i sighed angrily as i went to go grab my daily cup of coffee. they are always finding new ways to treat me like a baby!

"why are you guys arguing so early in the morning. the suns barely up and you two are already at it." i complained, sipping my cup of coffee.

john dory shuffled around uncomfortably, clearly feeling bad that i had heard their argument.

"it's nothing bitty b. go back to your room." bruce said a little sternly.

i groaned. he's not my dad! and i'm not little anymore!

"my name isn't bitty b." i muttered back as i took another sip of the coffee.

"don't be difficult branch just go back to your room." bruce said back, still forgetting that i'm an adult.

i scoffed and walked away because i didn't want to make a scene. i slipped into my room and slammed the door shut. i placed my ear up against the door, hearing the two of them start fighting again. i rolled my eyes and slumped down against the door. i hate it when they fight. i mean, who would like it? but still. it sucks. i looked around, searching for something to keep my mind off things when i hear a knock at my door. it's bruce.

"come in." i say bluntly as i move away from the door.

bruce comes in and closes the door behind himself. he looked tired. he must be, with all those kids. but he also looked like something else.. i just couldn't put my finger on it. until he spoke, that is.

"branch.. i'm going to be moving back in with my wife. i know we all just started hanging out again but.." he stopped himself to check the expression my face.

i kept composed. but thats not how i felt. i felt awful. worse than awful. is there a word for that? terrible? no, thats not it. but think of the worst feeling ever. thats how i felt. this is just like it was all those years ago during the bro zone concert. a fight starts and someone decides to leave. who's next? i knew i couldn't trust my brothers to stay a family. i shake my head, holding back tears.

"it's because of that fight, right?" i look up at bruce but he refused to make eye contact.

"i.. i've got to see my wife and kids anyways branch. you knew i'd have to do it at some point. but it's only a visit, i'll be back as soon as i let some anger out. i promise."

only a visit? who knows how long that will take. john dory is on a streak. he messed this family up once, why not do it again? hah. i really thought this time it would last.

i force a smile. "yeah, yeah whatever. just.. come back." i say a little shakily as i run up to bruce and wrap him in a hug.

he hugs me and pats me on the back in an assuring away. "of course branch." he say comfortingly as he heads out the door, probably to go pack his stuff.

i slump down in my bed. that's only the start. who'll leave next? clay? floyd? poppy???? with brothers like mine you can never learn to trust anyone. even if they mean the world to you, like poppy.

all those bad thoughts enter my head. i've never thought like that before. sure, maybe i look to the negative side of things. but not like this. this is a whole new low for me. i try thinking of a bright side but my mind comes out blank. i head to the bathroom so i can go wash my face. i splash cool water all over and look myself in the mirror. i stay there for a long, long time.

floyd's pov:

finally, john dory and bruce had finished fighting. i was sat in my room listening in on them the whole time. it wasn't unusual for them to fight, but i didn't want them to fight, either. i'm usually the peace maker, but in this moment i decided to take a day off. if i was always trying stop my brothers from fighting then i'd be exhausted. it's good for me to take a break every now and then.

but i could tell this fight was different because by the end of it, nobody apologized. instead, john dory stomped down the hallway and slammed his door shut. uh oh. i could then hear bruce open the door to branches room. another uh oh. i don't know what was going on but it definitely wasn't good. and i don't mean the usual type of not good. i got up out of bed just in time to catch bruce walking down the hallway.

"whats up? i heard you guys fighting, everything alright?"

bruce shakes his head sadly. "i'm going to go stay with my wife for a while. i'll be back, i just need a breather, y'know?"

my eyes widen once i realize what's happening. "what!? you can't just leave after one fight!" my voice lowers. "imagine what branch is thinking!! he probably thinks we're all going to leave him again!"

"he's not a baby anymore floyd. he's just going to have to deal with it like the rest of us." he says a little more harshly then he meant to.

i think of arguing back but give up, walking over to the kitchen. i don't want to put branch through what happened before. i comfort myself with the knowledge that it's just bruce who's leaving. the rest of us will stay, plus, bruce will be back after his trip! right?

branch pov:

i'm still in the bathroom, standing in front of the mirror. my eyes then dart to a razor sitting on the sink. nuh uh. no way. my eyes return to the mirror. despite my efforts, i feel myself looking back over at the razor. trying it out wouldn't hurt, right? well, it will hurt.. but it's just once! no shame in trying it out. i grab the razor and position it on a place higher up on my arm so it'll be easier to cover. without putting any more thought into it, i slash the blade across my skin, drawing blood. i yelp in pain as i grab some toilet paper to wipe it up. my arm stings like crazy. but i've got to admit, that definitely took my mind off of things. temporarily, anyways.