Six Years After (book 2)

Chapter 8

not much happens but fuck it we ball

Third person pov

Naruto's not going to lie here. It's... pretty gruesome.

Zabuza puts up a good fight, Naruto will admit. Just not a good enough one. Whilst he managed to take out clones One and Two, he failed to account for the third stalking him from behind in the bushes like a rabid honey badger. The poor guy never stood a chance. 

When he says that Zabuza's face gets torn to ribbons, Naruto means it looks like a barbecue platter gone wrong by the end of things. It's brutal. Naruto's definitely swearing off red meat for at least a month or two following this, and he's pretty sure the sentiment is shared by his teammates.

Sakura has to physically turn around about halfway through the assault just to keep her lunch down. Sasuke still has the same, twisted up expression on his face. Naruto's starting to think his eyebrows are going to get stuck scrunched up like that if he doesn't relax them soon, believe it.

It's not pretty. The screams are even worse. Tazuna looks an unhealthy shade of green by the time Zabuza finally goes quiet. Naruto half expects the remaining clone to turn around and maul them, but instead it just hisses furiously and bounds off into the woods. Naruto doesn't have the spine to try and follow and get rid of it, since dispelling it remotely sure as shit doesn't seem to work.

"Not sure where we went wrong, but let's never do that again." Naruto decided after a beat or two of silence, all of them staring off in the direction the clone fled with varying degrees of horror on their faces. "At least we're alive!"

"Your bare minimum will never cease to astound me." Kurama sounded deeply disturbed which is how you know it's bad. "Next time you ask for my help, know that I will be saying no. There will be no chakra from me unless it's a life or death situation. I want you bleeding out on the ground before you so much as think about tapping into my reserves."

Arguably, that was a life or death situation. But whatever, sure. Bleeding out on the ground-- Naruto can do that. With his luck, he'll be bleeding out on the ground before he knows it! 

"Alive is a low bar." Sakura murmured out dazedly, eyes still wide and unblinking. Naruto wondered what she'd say if he told her she was currently agreeing with the one and only Nine Tailed Fox. "Besides, one of those things got Sensei. I'm not sure why you're counting that as a win, Naruto!"

Ah, right. That had happened, hadn't it?

It's not as bad as it sounds. Kakashi was already on the verge of charka exhaustion, so really a stiff breeze could've knocked him over. The fact that one of Naruto's feral monster clones drop-kicked him halfway across the pond so hard he skipped like a stone has absolutely nothing to do with anything.

It's not like he's dead or anything. Is he going to be unconscious for several business days? Probably, but Naruto is sure that would've happened anyway. If Naruto's luck is the worst, Kashi is heading a close second. Likely, the curse is generational and Kakashi is gradually passing it on every time he and Naruto spend time together.

"He's fine! He's even breathing." Naruto nudged Kakashi with his foot, beaming down at him for a few seconds too long. He was breathing... right? Yeah. Yeah, no, his chest is definitely rising and falling right now. "This has totally happened before, believe it. He'll wake up in a few days and it'll be like it never happened!" 

Sakura didn't look like she completely believed him for some reason. Sasuke was still staring off after the clone, as though worried it might come back and leap out of the darkness at him. Naruto wanted to make fun of him for it, but honestly? It was a valid fear at this point.