At the bottom of everything(flashback)

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A/n: next episode is almost done, I've finished half of it but at the time of writing this chapter it's pretty late, but this song has made me cry thinking about the walking dead for far too long and it's about time I do something about it.

"So there was this woman and she was on an airplane and she was flying to meet her fiance, sailing high above the largest ocean on planet earth and she was seated next to this man who, You know, she tried to start a conversations and the only, really the only thing she heard him say was to order his bloody mary and she sitting there and she was reading this really arduous magazine article about a third world country. That she couldn't even pronounce the name of, and she was feeling very bored and very despondent and then, uh, suddenly there was this huge mechanical failure and one of the engines gave out. And they started falling thirty thousand feet, the pilot's on the microphone, he's saying 'i'm sorry, I'm sorry, oh my God, I'm sorry' and apologizing and she looks at the man and she says 'where are we going?' and he looks at her and says ' we're going to a party, it's a birthday party, it's your birthday party, we love you very very very very  very very very much and then, he starts humming this little tune and it kinda goes like this, it's kinda, one, two, one, two, three, four"

Carl Grimes listened to his older brother play music upstairs in their house in Alexandria. He never seemed to understand his music taste, mostly hip hop and old rock songs before the end of the world but after he noticed his brother gradually changed not only his music taste but his  personality as a whole. Alex loved to tell the stories of their travels through song and even used his mediocre guitar skills to play music with Beth Greene back when they lived in the prison. Carl understand why his brother liked the songs but he didn't know what the songs were about. He was clueless about it but things would change....

Carl had gotten bit, Everything had gone wrong but he made his choice and made a difference when it came to saving Siddiq. When he arrived home he examined the bite mark and sighed knowing that his time was up. He had gone around asking where his dad had gone, he was told that they had gone and michonne had also followed them only leaving him a letter, give Carl an idea and he quickly went over to their house and he went over to Alex's room and he grabbed a record from a crate. He brought Alex's record player into his room and began to play the record as he fumbles around in his drawer looking for his notebook and a pen. He proceeded to write letters to the ones he loves, he begins to take in the words of the song and he finally got why his brother listened to them. He looked down at his page, it was his letter to Alex.

"Dear Alex, I couldn't have asked for a better brother, you taught me so many things, you protected me from so many things but sometimes  the birds fall from the nest and they hit the ground without flying, i guess that's what happened to me. I got bit helping someone, something that you taught me back at the prison when you stopped me from killing that kid that surrendered I was angry and scared but you taught me that mercy goes along way in the grand scheme of things. I wanted to help build a new future but those dreams are gone for me, but I know if you, michonne and dad could try you, I know you can find peace with the saviours, i know dad wouldn't go for it, he wants negan dead for what he did to Glenn and Abraham and I know you want him dead for the same reason but your better, better than any of these adults because you care about people, you can see the good in people, so please see the good in negan, I'm not asking you to forgive him, I'm asking you to not kill him or the saviours. I love you."

- Carl

Carl had tears flowing down his face onto the page. He thought back to their times before the end of the world, where Carl always hoped that when he became a teenager that Him and Alex would have the sibling relationship that those old sit-coms would have where the older brother was a wannabe rockstar and would act like he hates the younger brother but he secretly loved him and they would love each other. That happened in a way but there was no rivalry or bullying or pranks, their relationship was built off of trust and love. He smiled at his paper and walked out of the room ready to make the most of his last day....

*Weeks later*

They had won...

After all their fighting and everything they've been through against the saviors they finally won. It was a bittersweet ending. They were led into a trap but by the help of Eugene who they thought had betrayed his community, they made it out with their lives. Rick and Alex had made a last stand against negan and managed to defeat him and keep him alive. But why? Why keep a man that they despised so much alive? Simple answer....

Carl.

Rick had lost his youngest son and Alex lost not only his little brother but his best friend. Alex felt empty, more empty then he had felt when his mother died. He was depressed, alone, angry...maybe if it wasn't for his anger and hatred against the saviors he could've been there for Carl. He looked down at his desk looking at Carl's letter to him. He read through again and again just to feel his brother's presence once more. He looked next to him and saw a piece of paper and pen. He sighed before picking it up and began writing his feelings, not just jolting them down but talking to someone, Talking to Carl, as if he were to read it on the other end, where ever that was.

"Dear Carl, You weren't a bird that fell from the nest, you flew. You flew much further than all of us and you brought back an olive branch. You gave us hope, you gave us a reason to keep fighting. Not just for me and dad, but for michonne, for Daryl, for everyone. I lost myself...along time ago, I did everything I did just to keep you safe, I kept pushing ahead but all I ever really needed to do was stay behind and hold you, protect you like a good brother should've...but I didn't and that's on me. That olive branch is holding something really important and that's the weight of where our choice to spare negan takes us. It wasn't easy, I wanted to bash his head in with his own bat but I couldn't...I couldn't do it because I knew you wouldn't want that. Disappointing your legacy is the last thing i want, dishonoring what you believed in. I love you Carl....I always will.

- Alex

Alex put the pen and paper down and he stared at the page, he looked to his left and there laid Lucille leaning on wall. He had picked up the weapon from the ground after defeating Negan. He only took it to hold that over Negan while he was held up in his cell. He got up from his desk and walked out downstairs before heading outside into the streets of Alexandria, Which was now under repair after the saviors attack the day before carl died. He saw it now, everyone brought together to build a future...Carl's new world

(A/n: Wrote this a while ago i just never finished it but due to the lack of chapters i decided to actually upload it)

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