When Destiny Hesitates [ZARRY]

Chapter 18

Zayn's POV

As we finally emerge from the Ferris wheel embrace, reality comes swooping back in. Harry worries his swollen lip between his teeth and it takes actual willpower not to chase that pout with my own mouth again immediately.

I clear my throat, pulse still pounding wildly. Taking his hand, I guide us towards a semi-secluded picnic table away from the crowds. We sit sideways facing each other, the emotional shift palpable between us.

Now that fiercely addictive lust fueled by weeks of longing simmers just below my skin instead of suffusing every cell. In its place settles anticipation - of what though still unclear. I search Harry's flickering gaze trying to read the vulnerability swirling there as he avoids eye contact.

Reaching slowly across the table, I cover his restless hand gently with mine until troubled emerald meets my stare. "Hey, it's alright..." I soothe. Harry's lips twist, unconvinced.

I take a steadying breath, thumb feathering over his knuckles. Time to lay my intentions bare no matter how overwhelming. "Look Harry, m'not very good talking feelings like this. But that kiss wasn't just messing around for me or whatever."

I pause marshaling my swirling emotions into coherence. Harry glances up finally through sooty lashes threaded with nervosa hope.

"Being with you these past weeks has made me start to think we could have something special growing between us." I squeeze his hand. "But I know you aren't used to letting people in and I respect needing to go slow."

Harry drinks in my searching gaze for a weighted moment before exhaling shakily. His broad shoulders uncurl slightly from their guarded hunch.

"I-I want that too Zayn," he admits hesitantly. "With you. This is all pretty new and scary if I'm honest. But kissing you just now felt righteously perfect." Dimples flash as Harry attempts a timid smile. "Nobody's made me feel this inexplicable pull before...it's equal parts terrifying and captivating trying to lean into it."

My heart kicks into overdrive hearing him echo my own tangled emotions. Lifting our joined hands, I brush my lips tenderly to his knuckles sealing this confessional new beginning unfolding under glittering bulbs strung just for us...

Harry's POV

Walking hand in hand with Zayn through the carnival afterward feels dangerously perfect - like I could get addicted to this brand-new intimacy. The warmth of his sturdy palm engulfing mine sparks flares of heat low in my belly.

But underneath the electrifying newness, my old doubts persist. Is someone like Zayn worth endangering my safeguarded heart for? He captivates me effortlessly yes, but everyone gets bored eventually moving onto the next temptation. Where will that leave me when he inevitably loses interest I wonder?

I must zone out during my brooding spiral because suddenly Zayn tugs me sideways gently. I blink startled to find us tucked away off the main path leaning against a trailer wall. Zayn brackets me in close, eyes serious but tender studying my face. His hand comes up automatically smoothing my worried brow with a featherlight thumb.

"Talk to me love, where'd you disappear to in that head of yours just now?"

My breath catches at the casual endearment falling from his unfairly kissable lips. But Zayn just continues trailing one calloused fingertip along my hairline patiently, coaxing the words from my knotted tongue.

"I just..." I swallow thickly, lean into his steady touch. "Everyone leaves eventually. What happens when you get bored of me or someone else catches your eye down the road?" I force the plaguing insecurity out in a miserable whisper.