A Modern Fairytale

The fallen angel

One night, I found you in your bird form, standing on a branch. I hesitated for a moment eventually decided to bring myself to you, taking a seat under that tree. If you being the only blue bird Valerie hangs around isn't enough indication, then you flying down to my shoulder would be—that you are Jena Kalyna.

I opened my palm to show twenty sunflower seeds. "Do you like these?" I asked. Instead of chirping in response, you seemed to just...stare at the seeds in...what was it, awe? Surprise? Shock? I have no clue how to read real birds.

To my relief, you hopped off my shoulder and turned into your human form—the one you take these days, not the golden-haired one I used to know. Don't get me wrong, it doens't matter what you prefer to look like. As long as you're you, you will always be beautiful to me. It's just that...these days, I'm not so sure. Last I checked, you were hit by Valen Ginemoux's blade. I was so certain that you'd died to him. I was so certain of it that my feathers turned black.

For you.

Partially, anyway.

But then, next thing I knew, you were fighting for Valerie Ginemoux, knowing those two were one and the same.

"I love sunflower seeds," you said, seating yourself next to me under the tree. You offered your hand, and I poured some seeds onto your palm—about half of them, probably. "Thanks!"

You know, there is a reason why I wasn't as enthusiastic about reuniting with you as I should have been or wanted to be. You're different. You have secrets now...ah, or maybe you always did have them, I just never had a clue. For instance, I never doubted or cared what you are, but now, I'm curious. I want to know.

But do I, really?

You nibbled on the seeds, staring off into the distance. I waited for a moment before leaning back to snack on the same. I was searching—searching for familiarity in a foreign face.

☆☆☆

I nibbled on the seeds, reminiscing the past you know nothing about.

Err on the side of kindness and you will never actually be wrong—or so the saying goes, and so I had believed for a short period of time at the dawn of my creation. As time passed, my faith wore thin, and I wasn't so sure anymore. I hadn't thought of that line for a long while, but watching you brought it back to the surface of my mind. In fact, my time with you as Venethema's rogue knight mostly reinforced the belief I had developed for myself—the same belief that had gotten me banished from the heavens in the first place—that kindness is not a bulletproof answer to every question. After all, where did it get you? Perhaps you don't think that of yourself, but you are a kind person. Despite your change and the subsequent darkening of your feathers, your gentleness stayed with you. Each time you chose to be kind, you lost a piece of yourself—and look at you now! My dear Ulric Lauregnory, the fair-skinned boy with a family and friends, strong enough to survive but too kind to strive...

"What is it?" I asked. You'd been staring for a few seconds now, without touching the seeds in your hand.

"...oh. Sorry." You let out a light chuckle and averted your gaze. "I was just wondering..."

Would you ask it? If you asked, I might answer. If you didn't, I cannot guarantee that I will be able to summon the courage to break the whole truth to you on my own. I was trained to fight wars, but I was not taught to be ruthless.

"Yeah?" I prompted. Did I want you to ask? Maybe.

"Why did you stay here?" you asked.

"I guess you're not asking about Rectitia."