NO ONE FOR ME BUT YOU

20) CONTRACEPTION

brooklyn

I walk out of my house closing the door as the engine of a dodge challenger turns of and theo walks out black t-shirt his hoodie blue jeans and his air max 95. He leans against the bonnet. "where you going." damn that's all he has to say after not talking to me for 2 days after our fight.

"to go start the pill" I unlock my car. "oh..lemme take you then."
"no"
"why not... Just lemme take you." anger boiled inside my body.

"I DONT NEED YOU THEO" I tell him his eyes fall turning dark and I see how much my words hurt him and my heart shatters. Shit I didn't mean it like that I do need him I just dont need him to take me to the clinic. "no I didn't mean it like that." he puts his hood up.

"nah its calm you don't need me innit." I go to walk up to him but he's already in his car he slams his car door and zooms out of my drive not even looking to see if a car was coming. Shit. He's mad really mad he never slams his door. I run a hand through my hair. Fuck.

I get in my car closing the door. I try to call him but he doesn't answer and after a little while it's doesn't even try to go threw. I try not to let the tears escape out of my eyes I'm not trying to cry over a man. But it pisses me off because I just told my mom how good he was to me and now he isn't even answering my calls.

I drive to the clinic with cloudy eyes. I sit in the waiting room my legs and arms crossed as my knee bounces. I've tried texting him but he just left me on delivered. "Brooklyn Paige." i stand up following the doctor Into the room.

"have a seat" I sit down and the doctor sits opposite me. "i hear that you are here to start the birth control." I nod. "do you know what type of birth control you want we have the pill the implants the iud which are the most effective or we have the hormonal ring oral contraceptive which is the pill or we have injection contraceptive which isn't as effective but still is."

Damn I didn't know there were so many choices."just the pill." he nods. "we have the minipill which is just progesterone or we have the pill which is progesterone and oestrogen." what the fuck is that and what is the difference god this is stressful. I pinch the bridge of my knows.

"what's the difference."
"the mini pill only has one hormone which helps change the thickness of the mucus at the entrance of the womb so it stops the sperms passing through the fertilised egg whereas the combined pill has two hormones progesterone which does what the mini pill does and oestrogen what stops the release of an egg each month." i nod trying my hardest not to bite my nails.

"don't worry I'll make sure that you have the one that suits you best but first I do have to ask you some questions you don't have to answer them if you don't want to but your honest answer will help me find the pill best suitable for you." I nod

"do you have a history of smoking, blood clots,blood pressure or diabetes?"
"no but I have smoked before but not continuously and it was over a year ago." he scribbles it down crossing a bunch of boxes.

"have you ever had sex before?"
"yes" a tick in a box
"what kind of sex?"
What kind of question is that. "oral vaginal and anal ." he nods ticking a bunch of boxes again now he probably thinks I'm a freak getting a dick up my ass but it wasn't by choice.
"how many people have you had sex with." oh fuck off this is great. How about 2 and a whole fucking gang I don't know.
"I don't know." he looks up at me
"the honest and most accurate you can be will assure me that I give you the best option that I can."
"um maybe um 10" fuck now he thinks I'm a slut.
"are you still sexually active."
"yes" another box ticked.
"with multiple people or just 1" yep he thinks I'm a slag.
"just my boyfriend so 1"
"and how old are you"
"Nine-nineteen"
He look ups
"are you sure about that" dickhead
"yes I'm sure. "

"OK only 2 question left."
"do your or you current partner have history of sti or do either of you have one now."
"i have no history of an sti but I don't know about my boyfriend but we are both clean now." he crossing a box.
"what is your intention for the pill. Is it to regulate your period or to protect you from getting pregnant or both."
"both" he nods.

"I need you to know that the pill cannot stop you from getting sexually transmitted diseases so if you do have sex we still recommend the use of a condom." i nod. Didn't I just tell this motherfucker that me and my man are clean?

"OK seeing as you want to regulate your period and stop yourself from getting pregnant we recommend the combined pill. This need to be take everyday at the same time for exactly 21 days then you don't take it for 7 day this allows you to have your period and then you take it after the 7 day are up don't worry about remembering the pill come with 21 pill in a packet and each one has a day on it to make sure don't forget."

He scribble down the prescription handing it to me. "go to your local pharmacy to get your pills and take your first one today and make sure to not have unprotected sex for 7 day as the pill doesn't work straight away all symptoms and sideffects will be on the packet and make sure to read them properly." i smile.

"thank you" dickhead. I stand up and drive to the nearest pharmacy collecting the pills and taking one in my car I put a timer on for that time for everyday so I don't forget to take it.

I really need to talk to theo because I'm scared I might lose him over something stupid and he means to much to me to let him go.