Too Late For Regrets [Extra #1]

Part 34

After that unpleasant visit from my husband, my King and I decided to go to a place where that bastard would never set his foot in.

My grandfather's house.

Unlike his son – my father – my grandpa was a great man. He was my rock. After my parents threw me out of the house at the age of eighteen with absolutely nothing, he took me in and helped me become the best version of myself. He taught me about business, helped me get on my feet and supported me when I needed it the most. I knew I could always trust him and come to him if I ever had trouble. I loved him dearly. He was the only member of my fucked-up family that I actually respected and admired.

That was why I wanted to see him before... the inevitable.

Since he lived in Florida, my King and I didn't need to make many preparations for the journey. We were already in the same state, anyway.

My grandfather was really excited to see me at his doorstep. He rushed me and my King inside then proceeded to interrogate me about my marriage. He quite bluntly expressed his opinion on my father's actions and said he would disown the 'son of a bitch' for what he had done to me. I was more than happy to hear it, but I kept my expression calm. My grandpa didn't need to know I was even more evil than my parents.

Surprisingly, my grandpa wasn't shocked to see me with my King, and he treated him like his true grandson instead of a simple guest. He told us he knew about our special relationship and he had always hoped to see us married someday. Unfortunately, my family ruined his dream. Though, he was still happy for us.

I didn't have the heart to tell him I only wanted to visit him because I was going to die soon. It didn't feel right to break his heart even more after all the hardships he'd suffered because of my family. His own son took everything from him and left him with nearly nothing, his daughter-in-law – my mother – forbid him from seeing his grandchildren and his wife didn't want to know him because he didn't include her in his will. What a mess. How could I possibly tell him that I was about to leave him completely alone? Since he didn't keep in touch with neither my parents nor my sister, I was the only family he had. How was I supposed to tell him that I would soon die? That I would soon disappear?

I couldn't do that to him.

Though, at the same time, it felt even more cruel to keep the truth from him. If it was me, I would like to know the truth, no matter how bad it may be.

For days, I deliberated on whether to tell him about my upcoming death or not, all the while spending as much time with my dear grandpa as possible. He was more than happy to have me in his house again. Although, it felt like he was happier about me bringing a man with me rather than just me visiting. From the very first day, he would tell my King to follow him, and then pretty much used him for physical labor. My King found it amusing, more than anything, but I could see he was tired after a long day of work. He would simply lie on the bed with me and fall dead asleep in seconds. He still didn't forget to give me a kiss goodnight, though.

It was the seventh, or maybe eighth day of my visit when I finally mustered up the courage to face my grandpa and tell him the truth. My King was working outside on some shed or something similar, so I could talk to my grandfather in private. Not that I couldn't tell him everything in front of my King. He knew the truth as well, so it wasn't like it was some big secret of mine. I simply wanted to be alone with my grandpa when he learned the truth.

I concluded that he deserved to hear it from me rather than find out about it later from an obituary or... my husband. I doubted my parents would care enough to notify my grandpa, with whom they had no contact in years, about me. They probably wouldn't care enough to attend my funeral, anyway, not that I wanted them to. When it came to my husband, though, I felt like he would take that extra step to tell my beloved grandpa about my death. He genuinely felt guilty for hurting me and I knew I could trust that guilt to guide him in the right direction.

Even if it was too late.

"What is it, my dear?" my grandpa asked when I sat in absolute silence after requesting to have a talk with him. He must've seen that I had something serious to discuss, because he moved from his seat to sit right beside me and held my hand tightly in his.

"I have to tell you something..."

"You can tell me everything, you know that."

"I know. I wondered if it was a good idea to tell you this, but... I couldn't just hide it. Not from you. You deserve to hear this from me," I took a shaky breath, looked him straight in the eye and revealed the truth. "Grandpa, I will die soon."

My grandfather was baffled, to say the least. He looked at me as though I had revealed that I was a mermaid. His gaze was disbelieving, shocked, and broken at the same time. He knew I wouldn't joke about something so grave. No pun intended.

"Why? How? Are you sick?" he choked out, pulling me into his arms, as if trying to convince himself that I was still there.

"I had an... accident, and I hit my head really hard. Now there's blood collecting in my brain. And I can't have the surgery to remove it, because I can't take anesthesia. The doctors told me it would take around half a year for that hematoma to kill me. It's constantly growing and it's pressing on my nerves. I will most likely start losing my sight soon, since I can already feel pain in the back of my eyes..." I explained quietly, laying my head on his shoulder. "I'm so sorry I'm leaving you alone... I didn't want this."

"I know, my baby. I know," he rubbed my head soothingly, quietly crying into my shoulder. "I'm so sorry it happened to you. You don't deserve such fate. It's unfair."

"Life's never fair, though," I lightly joked.

"Does that young man who came with you...?"

"He knows," I cut in. "That's why he's travelling with me. He wanted to be with me till the end."

"How can you talk about it so casually?" my grandpa asked, seemingly bewildered by my calmness.

"I guess I've come to terms with it," I shrugged. "If it's inevitable, it's no use to cry over it. I cried at first, but now... I just gave up. I don't want to waste my life away, now that I have so little left. It's better to enjoy it to the fullest, right?"

"You finally took my advice to heart..." grandpa smiled softly, brushing away some stray hair from my face. "As glad as I am about it, I am also sad. My sweet little girl was forced to accept such cruel fate."

I could only smile bitterly at that. Cruel fate, huh? It sure was.

But there was nothing I could do about it. I couldn't avoid it, couldn't change it, couldn't overcome it. It was useless of me to cry over spilt milk.

It was too late for anything. All I could do was accept it.

I stayed at my grandpa's house for two more weeks. My stay would've been longer if it wasn't for my in-laws' persistence. For three whole days, they'd been calling me about some meeting. They were so annoyingly relentless that I had no choice but to agree to see them.

Much to my surprise, it was my husband who came to pick me up. It was slightly unreasonable of him because I was three states away, but I didn't bother telling him that he was an idiot. He knew it himself.

Although he didn't say it, it was clear that he wasn't happy that I was with my King. He begrudgingly let him come with me, mostly because I told him that if my King couldn't come, I wouldn't go either.

It was laughable how easily he agreed when I said that. Though, he still made sure to be petty and told my King to sit in the back of the car while I sat in the front.

For a split second, I thought about grabbing the wheel and getting us into an accident, but I couldn't possibly do that to my beloved King. Had I been alone with my husband, I probably would've caused a car crash and killed us both, but my King didn't deserve to die with us.

I loved him. How could I possibly kill him?