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Douxie made a mistake for falling in love with someone that could never be his. But he's okay with it. Right? For they were the most perfect couple. Douxie has no doubt about that. So then why is he hurt and in pain over something so wonderful... Hisirdoux Casperan is not okay...

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He sees them, he sees her, he sees... him. Sees their smiles, glances at her smile, saddens at his smile... It's a common occurrence now. It's happened so much times, he can't deny that he isn't used to it by now.

Honestly, what was he thinking when he fell in love with the boy. Who, in fact, has a girlfriend. Only the one ridiculous and sad for nothing 900 year old wizard, the man himself, Hisirdoux Casperan. He stays up at night eyes lost on the ceiling, and he knows... knows that he's supposed to be happy for them. But when it all comes down to it he feels like crying, even a little, when he sees them together. It makes him sick. Sick to feel that he has this feeling in his gut that dampens his mood for the couple. Sick that these feeling grow when- when he's around.

And maybe he does deserve this torment and suffering inside. Because what kind of an ally, friend, what hero wouldn't be happy for others happiness. Maybe he does feel a little happy, but really he wished it were him and not her. The more he thinks on it the more guilty he feels deep down.

Because in reality he doesn't have the history, moments and hardships, basically the relationship they have with each other. And oh fuzzbuckets- it's not like he knows if he'd be interested in him. No, not this time, he won't let this tear him down another night. He won't salt the earth for nothing, instead he'll lift his lips upward, whether it looks forced or not.

If he sees them leaping at each other after another battle, he'll smile. If he sees them on his shift, on a date, kissing, he's gonna smile. If he sees them taking on the world together, holding hands and shedding tears, he's gonna smile. No, not heartbroken, not sad, not guilty, not- not in love, not anymore, he's gonna smile, because he should.

But fuck if this pain lasts any longer he's gonna break for good...

If he sees Jim and Claire...