Obsession [slow updates]

9 (part 2)

Nicki looked up at Beyoncé desperately trying to stop crying. She couldn't believe the power Beyoncé had over her in that moment. She hated Lauren. She hated her. But she hated herself too. Even as she cried, Beyoncé's attention was making her feel better.

"N-nothing I'm fine" she stuttered despite the water that was pouring from her eyelids. Beyoncé gave her look that said 'be serious' causing Nicki to try and laugh through her flowing sea of tears. She hated crying. She felt so small. She felt somewhat better now that Beyoncé held her, but she still hated the way she felt in this moment.

Beyoncé held her tight and tried to wipe some of the tears. She had never seen Nicki cry, and instantly felt guilty. She barely knew this girl she'd spent so many nights with. And now that she was crying in her arms, and Beyoncé didn't know what to say. She rubbed Nicki's arms soothingly, saying, "Shh, shh...it's okay. Tell me what's wrong."

Nicki sniffled, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand, swallowing thickly as she tried to steady her breathing. "I— I had a fight with my friend," Nicki explained. "I didn't think it was bothering me but... Sorry—" she sniffled again, hoping that no embarrassing snot bubbles would form and make her look ugly. She couldn't believe she was crying in front of Beyoncé. She felt so stupid as she wiped her nose desperately, willing her tears to stop. Beyoncé stroked a hand over her face, moving her to sit on the couch beside the bed.

"No don't apologise." She rubbed her back in circles "I'm the one who should be sorry. I should've asked if you wanted to cancel." Beyoncé felt guilty that she hadn't really given Nicki the chance. Even if she had wanted to cancel, Beyoncé wouldn't have known until hours later.

"You know you don't always have to come just because I call," She giggled, earning a weak smile from Nicki. Nicki always came when she called. She dropped everything she was doing and showed up. Truthfully, Beyoncé was beginning to find it strange. While it was useful, she didn't want Nicki to be stopping her life just for her. She wanted to dominate her sexually but outside of the bedroom, they were equals. Nicki should have her own life. But to Nicki, this was her life.

"You have the prettiest smile," Beyoncé tried to cheer her up as she watched her wipe her tears.

"Really?" Nicki sniffed, trying to stop the grin that threatened to spread like butter across her face. Beyoncé nodded and while Nicki was still crying, Beyoncé's compliment made her heart begin to flutter. Beyoncé always knew exactly how to make her smile, even when tears were pouring from her eyes.

"I wanted to come." Nicki squeaked out carefully. Her tears began to dry as she relaxed into the ease of Beyoncé. "I needed a distraction." Her voice was barely above a whisper. She had expected this encounter to take her mind off of her friends, but maybe she needed to let out the tears. Her eyes dropped as Beyoncé nodded in recognition.

"Me too," Beyoncé said taking a deep breath. "I called you for a distraction as well" Beyoncé hummed flicking  on the tv for some background noise. It was playing some kind of soap opera that neither of them recognised.

"What did you need a distraction from?" Nicki asked suspiciously, eyeing her. She knew Beyoncé's work was hard but she hoped that it was her marriage causing problems. Beyoncé called her more frequently now; before it was sporadic, and months would pass without a call. But now it was at least once a week. Surely, her husband had begun to suspect something. Was her husband the thing that was bothering Beyoncé?

"Stupid rumours" Beyoncé sighed and tucked in her plump lips. She didn't know if she wanted to tell Nicki everything but she also didn't have many people who she could speak to. Outside of a therapist whom she paid a great deal of money to, she couldn't tell anyone else without worrying about their reaction. Her close family and friends all had bias opinions and she didn't trust anyone else not to leak details of her life to the press or some gossip site, which would only make things worse for her.