collabs with others

Interdimensional space dentistry! (Chapter 1)

Sara took a deep breath, before diving into the water. It had been a while since she had last operated on the space whale, and she hoped the whales gingivitis wouldn't kill her brother.

He was a bit of a weakling... at least that was what she thought when he shied away from a mere soul bunny calf.

She dove down deeper, the viscosity of the maple syrup making her muscles ache. "Don't worry," she thought. "Just a routine check up, nothing more." But then she smelled the stink. It was a rotting stink, the kind you would get if you let a barrel of lutefisk sit out in the sun for 7 days and then pissed on it. It was a scent that sara wished she hadn't ever smelled.

As the monstrous syrup whale came in to view, she gasped.

The scent filled her nostrils, her sinuses, her eyes, everything. She dry retched, thankful for once that she hadn't had time for breakfast.

 She reached again as she saw that the whale...the whale...was bellowing as much as was possible in a lake pure Vermont maple syrup, Vermont being the innermost planet of the pamplemousse solar system. She did not yet know the source of the pain, but she was already scared, this job would NOT be "just a routine job".

"Whatever," she thought, pulling out her toolbox. "Let's get started, shall we?" 

She wrenched a wrench from the inside of her toolbox, and doggy paddled towards the whale. The seconds stretched into minutes as she tried to pass through the thick liquid. As her kid gloved fingers came in contact with the surprisingly smooth oily hide of the whale, it bellowed one large and all consuming bellow before swallowing her whole.

The whales bellowing ever louder, she questioned her decision to get an interdimensional dentistry degree. She switched to breaststroke, and realized it was much easier to swim like that. She reached the whale, and through her telepathic link said "I'm going to have to give you a painkiller for your root canal. Is that alright with you?"

This worked well from inside its mouth. Good view of the molars, you know.

The whale replied with a bubbly "ehehehehe now I'm going to eat you." The day really wasn't going sara's way.

Well... maybe if she was eaten, she could be the first person to operate on an angelic pig! She thought she might as well be eaten with hopes of post Mortem degrees.

She scoffed at herself. This was no time for defeatism! As everyone knows, interdentestrial workers are allowed to free themselves from mouths by any means necessary. And that was exactly what she would do.

 She grabbed her sword with a strong sense of discomfort and an even stronger sense of guilt, The rhinestone studded hilt gleamed in the dim light filtering through the whales teeth.

And then swung at the space whales molars! They broke easily, (seeing as they were indeed rotten) leaving her with an escape route.

She swam for dear life, the bellow of the whale driving her out of its mouth and sputtering stickily to the surface, the Amber waves of syrup dancing around her.

How did that old song go? Oh beautiful for spacious skies, Amber waves of syrup? What was that called again? Angelica the beautiful? No... Hmmm. She let the matter go, instead focusing on the task that was extracting herself from the lake and arriving unsticky back in her vehicle .

She broke surface next to a simple rowboat, all her company could afford. An androgynous elf sat on the boat, looking at her with an unreadable smile. "Soooo, how did it go?" Sara gasped for air before replying with an irritated "shaddup, wren. A'least MY first solo mission didn't end in casualties." The elf smiled their peculiar smile before hoisting Sara onto the boat. 

Their purplish hair shone mischievously in the now moon light. The widerwops sang sadly in the reeds. 

As wren rowed then both back to shore, Sara recounted the days events. Partway through, however, wren interrupted her suddenly, and asked. "Do you miiind if iiii sing a song from my youth?"

"Uhhhh...  Sure.....?" 

Sara was surprised, considering that wren never liked to talk about their youth. It was just one of those things that they avoided whenever they got the chance, like green socks, or bad oatmeal.

Wren took a deep breath, before starting. As soon as they did, all the widerwomps flew off, including one named Bob, who would later work for a rival interdentistrial company.

"Haters gonna hate hate hate hate but I'm just gonna shake shake shake shake..."

"Noooo!" Sara yelled, surprised by this sudden assault in her ears. 

"Wrong song. You see... I was listening to classic earthen hits on my way here."

This time, a slightly crackly but melodious voice drifts through the air as wren let's out a soft  song in what appears to be elvish.

The one word that Sara can clearly make out is "łamartïnîl hantosįl itonuoro". It means, to the best of their knowledge, 'you have daddy issues, don't you.'

Is this pop....? Folk.....? Traditional....? She knows not. The soft singing suddenly turns to what sounds like rock. Wren is surprisingly good at air guitar. As their slender fingers drift up and down the imaginary frets, she wonders why the can almost hear the backup singers?

Almost sensing her confusion, wren stops and says "it's... a traditional elvish piiiiece. Played at fuuunerals, weeeddings, and on the fiiirst day of school. The lyrics represent the singers liiife. Since you always aaask about my paaast, I decided to reward you for your great work today." They gave a wry smile.

Sara feels both honored and confused. "Whatever! Back to the dorm!"

Wren rolls their eyes and says "fiiine, fine. You did great today. I'm serious. Now then, let's go have some nice angelic pork, and get you your professional certificate!"

"Me... pro... certificate....?" She was in shock.

"Indeeeed!" Wren said. "You've passed alllll the tests, and can now be a full-Time innnterdentrician with me!" They beamed.

She jumped for joy, forgetting that they were in a boat.

"Careful!" Yelled wren. "That whaaale's still on the loooookout for you, and we caaan't have you dying on us!" Despite the immense whale-danger, they continued laughing, arguing, and singing, all the way back to shore.