one of them

seventeen

DJ's POV

I opened my eyes. There was that same bright light again that I saw after I woke up from the church.

I was at a hospital.

I quickly felt the pain in my arm. I groaned and tried to sit up, but when I did, I tried to use my hand without thinking and slumped right back down.

"DJ!" I heard someone exclaim.

My head was still pounding.

I looked over and Sodapop hugged me before I could notice anything else going on.

"Thank God." Darry said from the corner. He rubbed his fingers on his nose out of relief.

Ponyboy sat on the floor in the corner. He seemed shocked. Like he had just seen a ghost.

Although what he probably saw was worse.

"Dally... Johnny..." I muttered.

I felt the tears well in my eyes. "Deej, don't think about them right now." Sodapop said sitting at the end of the bed.

"H-How can I not think about them?" I asked.

"Johnnys out of surgery." Darry said. "Still asleep, but it went well. Not sure how his body is gonna react to it yet."

I sighed. That was a good sign. "Dally's in critical condition. That's what the doctor said." Sodapop continued.

"He's alive?" I asked in shock.

"Yeah. Hit him pretty hard, but they have him on a bunch of different things. They're hoping he wakes up soon. They did a bunch of different things last night to try and get him to where he is now." Ponyboy said plainly.

That was a good thing...

He wasn't dead,.. yet.

At this point I was sitting up trying to process everything going on. I leaned my head down into my knees and started to cry.

"DJ, it's alright." Sodapop said.

"No, it's not. It's all my fault."

"What's your fault?" Daddy asked.

"Everything! If I didn't make you even more upset, you wouldn't have taken it out on Ponyboy. If I just got in that church a second sooner, I could have saved Johnny. He would have been fine. We all would have. Because Johnny was gonna die, Dallas ran off and got himself killed. I can't do anything right." I sobbed.

"DJ, you wouldn't have known. And hey, if you weren't here, things could have gone a lot worse." Darry said.

"What's worse than killing your two friends? Getting your entire family in trouble? I've been so awful to you guys ever since mom and dad died. And now I'm trying to fix it, but it's too late."

"DJ..." Soda consoled.

"I wanna go home..." I mumbled. Tears weren't failing to leave my eyes.

"Let me go talk to a doctor." Darry said.

I laid back down trying to stop my tears. But it wasn't working. I felt terrible.

Ponyboy's POV

I wonder why she took that bullet for Dallas. It could save his life. If he wakes up, it'll entirely be from her.

I felt so nauseous and I wanted to just sleep. I was burning up, but I couldn't not see DJ in the hospital. And the way she's talking made me feel worse.

How could she say that about herself?

I told Dallas this back in Windrixville, but there was just something about her. Made everyone like her. More of a leader not a follower. And for her to blame this all on herself... I just don't know how she came to that conclusion.

DJ's POV

Darry walked back in the room and sighed. "Alright, they're gonna give us some antibiotics for you to take home. They're gonna help the pain go away. You gotta come back every two weeks, though. A nurse is gonna come in a few minutes to make sure everything's okay. Then we can leave."

"Okay." I said trying to calm myself down.

The three of them had to leave the room while the nurse checked out my arm.

"Excuse me..." I muttered.

"Yeah?" The nurse responded.

"How are Dally and Johnny doing? Really? Are they gonna be okay?"

"It's hard to tell right now. They're both not allowed visitors due to their state. But they are alive."

I sighed. That was a good thing. Better than before.

Right?

I managed to put my clothes on and my arm still hurt like hell once I got my mind off of everything going on.

Darry drove us home and Ponyboy immediately went to bed. I knew he looked sick. He didn't need this right now.

My head still hurt pretty bad so I went to bed as well.

I was up one night while Soda and Darry were at work. I heard a knock on the door. "Come in!" I said without thinking.

Everyone always just came in, so it felt natural. But maybe I shouldn't have invited someone who doesn't know that inside.

The door hesitantly opened as I walked out into the living room. I noticed who it was. "Randy?"

"Hey, DJ."

"Uh... what are you doing here?"

"Can I talk to Ponyboy?"

"I dunno. He's not feeling real well right now. I think all the bologna he had when he ran off is getting to him. The rumble didn't help either."

"Please? I really want to." He had a book in his hand. I was worried he was gonna hurt him, but why would he use a book? "I'll only be a few minutes."

I sighed. "Second door next to the kitchen on the right. But if he doesn't want you here, can you leave?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I can do that."

He walked into Pony's room and I tried to listen in while I was in the kitchen, but I wasn't really picking up on anything they were saying.

Randy left without a word to me. He walked right past me and out the door. I went into Ponyboy's room.

"Pony, you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm alright."

"What did Randy want?"

"He just wanted to talk. Told me a few stories about Bob. I think the whole trial is making him nervous."

Fuck.

The trial.

That's in a couple days.