Just sit and read (Oneshots)

I loved and loved you no meter what, but now it only hurts.

Another dinner. Another time I have to be in this uncomfortable situation. Another time I smile and accept hidden insults and pitying glances. All this to make the man I love happy. However, let's start from the beginning. When I met Carter, I was just starting an internship at the company he worked for. I was fresh out of an archotectonics degree and needed a job. I had never liked the profession. I preferred to be a painter. However, my parents pressured me to have a more stable profession. After a difficult period of study, I found an apprenticeship in a landscape architecture company. The head of my department was actually Carter. I have to admit that I wasn't liked by the other employees. I don't blame them. I had always been sensitive and quiet. On top of that, I came from a wealthy family, which added fuel to the fire. The only one who showed me understanding and care was my current boyfriend. Unfortunately, this didn't make me any friends either, especially in the women's section of the office. Understandably, Carter was the most handsome there. Tall, well-built with light hazel eyes and hair, he attracted the eye. His curly hair and Hispanic type of beauty attracted women like a magnet. To this day I wonder what he saw in me. The fact that he came from a not wealthy family and earned his own money to pay for a university, which he completed with honours, made everyone admire and respect him. He was the pride of his parents and his younger brother. It was no wonder that he caught my attention. He was almost ten years older and had this aura of masculinity surrounding him. I took great care in selecting my clothes every time I had to go to the office.I'm short so I've always worn high heels. I can't boast about any curves, but I'm not completely flat. I try to eat healthy and keep a slim figure. I always braid my long red hair and straighten my front fringes. I tried to avoid make-up but slowly started watching videos on how to do it and look natural. With small plugs I changed more aspects of my look and Carter noticed and complimented each one. The only thing I couldn't change was my character.I was always quiet, took everything personally and didn't know how to deal with sadness. Because of this, my parents had been sending me to different therapists for as long as I can remember and they prescribed me different medications. However, I didn't like taking them so I decided to take them only when necessary. Our acquaintance soon began to evolve. We started spending time together outside of work. We became a couple at the end of my internship. I didn't get a job but Carter assured me that I didn't have to work in a job I didn't like. He created a place for me to paint in his flat. I was in awe. He understood me without words. He never forced me to do anything I didn't like. He would earn, pay the bills, cook and take care of the house and I would paint. Every attempt I made to take care of the house or myself usually ended in a small disaster. I didn't notice at the time how dependent on Carter I was becoming . How clumsy I was. I didn't want to notice it because I was just fine with it. My parents were delighted with my boyfriend. They liked him straight away. They said he was the person I needed in my life. Stable, steady. The complete opposite of me. While my parents were happy, Carter's family were not. They welcomed me very coldly and with a distance. I felt terrible as I told them I was a painter and they smiled mockingly at me. His mother had to suppress a laugh. The most negative towards me was Carter's brother, John. He would openly send cutting remarks or disguised insults in my direction whenever the opportunity arose. What killed me, was the fact that Carter didn't seem to want to defend me at all. After that dinner he apologised to me for his family's behaviour but nothing more. He never apologised to me for them again. That's when my hell began. John seems to have made it a point of honour to make my life miserable at every turn. He would drop by our flat on any pretext and sit up late. Carter never asked him to leave. During one of these visits, John "accidentally" destroyed a painting that I had been working on for several weeks and for which I already had a buyer. I got angry at the time but Carter just said: