(Crude Hazbin/helluva leveled humor)
PLEASE READ DESCRIPTION OF THE BOOK IF YOU HAVENT ALREADY🌸Y/N POV UwU:
I wake up blinking my gorgeous blue orbs. My cheeks were stained from tears from crying, screaming, barfing, pissing, shitting, and cumming last night. I joined the military to escape my abusive family after the refused to get me a happy meal, those disgusting selfish bastards I hope they all fucking die. Task force has been nice so far especially the lieutenant, ghost. He's so fucking hot and big compared to me (I'm 1.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000.69 centimeters tall uwu). I get out of bed throwing my perfect and fluffy piss yellow blonde hair into a messy bun and walk over to my bathroom to change into my gear that my chest is too big to fully fit in >_<
Once I'm finished I head over to the cafeteria where I see König and Horangi for some reason because aparently neither Kortac or Gaz exists anymore, I wave to them and they immediately walk away such bakas! I grab my breakfast and shove it all into my throat, I'm not like other girls, I eat as messy and as disgusting as I can UwU🌸
All of a sudden I need to take fucking dump so I run to the bathroom or so I thought.. I have somehow accidentally made it into the men's changing room where I see Ghost-senpai and soap talking. Ghost is so muscley and hot and has such giant fucking tits, I can feel my face heat up out of embarrassment
"OH-EMM-GEE IM S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-SO SORRY MR GHOST SIR PLEASE FORGIVE ME"
My nose starts to bleed a shit ton. I run out of there in embarrassment, I start to cry again.💀Ghost POV:
Who and what the fuck was that.🌸Y/N POV UwU:
I'm sobbing on my bed now. Not only did I embarrass myself infront of Ghost and Soap but I also got shouted at by Price because I refused to go into battle and quit harassing every masked man I see! I sigh into my pillow
"Oh, GHOSTS,KÖNIGS,AND-KEEGANSCUMSLUTWHOREBITCHFUCKDOLL420-69, we've done it now.."
I say to myself crying into my pillow until I hear a knock at my door. I go and answer it and.. ITS GHOST!
"G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-Ghost..?"
"Price says your being kicked out of the military"
"I want you"
"What."
Ghost doesn't accept my confession and I leave. I guess it's back to watching cosplayers fuck their phones I guess 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔
_____
Authors notes:
Why the fuck did you read thisAnyways thinking of doing König next if anyone wants a part two to this shitstorm
YOU ARE READING
COD men x Y/N 🥵🥵🥵(satire)
FanfictionThis is a satire book to joke about how cringey the Y/N side of the cod fandom is. This isn't meant to harass or harm anyone this all just for good fun